Much Ado About Me


	I am ...getting rained on in Tokyo. ...old enough to drink alcohol but not old enough to know when to stop. ...blogging since 02/22/03.


	Monday, March 31, 2003 A girl packs her suitcase Tomorrow she leaves for a one-week vacation in Honolulu. What was in her suitcase before we sat down for some midnight ice cream snack: 4 bikinis 7 T-shirts 7 tank tops 1 pair of shorts 3 pair of pants (jeans, capri pants, black pants) 3 sweaters 2 cardigans 3 skirts: normal skirt, jeans skirt, one made out of leather 2 sunglasses various unlisted items 5 pair of shoes: flip flops, sandals, sneakers, brown dress shoes, black dress shoes This girl bought a blue towel to match with her pink bikini because her other towel was purple. The brown dress shoes match her leather skirt. She absolutely must take her white T-shirt because it compliments tanned skin. She needs to pack so many clothes so that she and JG can coordinate the clothes they wear on a daily basis. TS tries to persuade her to pack lightly but she escapes reasoning and locks herself in the bathroom to wash her hair. posted by Bunny at 9:38 AM


	More tourist log Yesterday we went to the movies and watched "Boat Trip". I have to admit that the movie had its funny moments but most of the time Cuba Gooding Jr. grimaced into the camera while the screenwriters tried to cram as many stereotypes and cliches about homosexuals into the movie as possible. To make things worse, they included Swedish blondes on the way to a Hawaiian Tropical Tanning Contest. The gay couple sitting next to TS seemed to enjoy the film nonetheless. Bill played tour guide and drove us outside of SF so that we could enjoy the spectacular view from some hills onto the Golden Gate Bridge. I had no clue to where we were shipped but it was nice. We shot a lot of panorama photos, the kind of pictures that nobody looks at for a second time. I ate my first pastrami sandwich and dipped my hand into the Pacific ocean. posted by Bunny at 8:22 AM


	Sunday, March 30, 2003 Nerd moment Yesterday my blogger template was totally messed up. I've just managed to fix it without any help from my computer-savvy friends. I am so happy. posted by Bunny at 5:09 AM


	Saturday, March 29, 2003 Tourist tour Fishermen's Wharf: Overpriced ice cream, stinking sea lions and tourist shops. I finally found saltwater taffy but it was a rather disappointing experience as the taffy didn't taste salty at all. We sat on a bench and watched some guys in speedos take a swim in the San Francisco bay. A seagull with diarrhea stood motionless next to us for five minutes while a boy named Forrest played in the sand. posted by Bunny at 7:40 AM


	Friday, March 28, 2003 The krauts are coming My boyfriend and I went for a stroll downtown. During our walk we passed at least twenty Germans. We overheard four of them at Starbucks and ten of them in Chinatown. I've met less during the last two months in Nottingham. Another bewildering experience today was seeing two women in pink sweat suits with matching shoes. posted by Bunny at 5:14 AM


	Thursday, March 27, 2003 First times Today it was the first time I dreamt of having a birthday party on the moon. Then I visited Alcatraz for the first time. I bought my first kiwi/strawberry Snapple on the boat and tried hard not to look like a Japanese tourist hiding my camera. Alcatraz had lots of seagulls but no prisoners. The wind blew hard on Alcatraz but the island was covered with flowers. I watched the other tourists and saw somebody eat cheese from an aerosol dispenser for the first time. posted by Bunny at 4:42 AM


	Tuesday, March 25, 2003 Impressions from San Francisco The California Federal Bank has anthropomorphic ATMs which tell you stuff like "What can I help you with?", "Okay", "I'm working" and "I have 20 and 10 Dollar bills". Homeless people push their belongings through the streets in shopping carts or sit at McDonald's. No smoking within 15 feet of the entries of public buildings. Went to the San Francisco State University today. SFSU's motto: "Love is stronger than hate". The administration building is crammed with police. Stairs are cordoned off and you're only allowed to take the elevators of which one is out of order. Policemen posted on every floor. So that's what it's like with homeland security orange. posted by Bunny at 11:49 PM


	Childhood memory # 2 In my early days I figured that a movie would stop exactly at the point where my parents switched off the TV. That's why I wouldn't make a big scene when it was 9 p.m. and I couldn't watch James Bond kill the evil guy off and get to more pleasant activities with his Bond girls. I went to bed without complaining and the day after, I would have completely forgotten about the movie. Later in life my parents used to tell me how nice and obedient I used to be... I wasn't, I just had a memory that sucked. posted by Bunny at 8:47 PM


	Uniform designer Flight was agreeable except for the static cling of the British Airways blankets. The stewardesses wore the most unbecoming uniforms I've ever seen at an airline (Blouses and skirts with a navy-white-pink pattern). They even beat the little red hats (with an scarf attached) that Emirates make their female crew wear. Lufthansa stewardesses are dressed in boring navy. So far I like the China Airlines uniforms best even though mauve is not for everybody. posted by Bunny at 3:10 AM


	Monday, March 24, 2003 Please fasten your seat-belts That's it. Suitcase packed, cab waiting outside, coach ride to London Stansted, 12h-flight to San Francisco. When I was a kid I loved the feeling of take-off and landing. Flying was like Disneyland. Now it's become as boring as a train ride. The only difference is that you have to bear with your co-travelers longer. You usually sit next to a fat guy who pokes his elbow into your ribs. However, it’s far worse to sit next to an obnoxious guy who will ignore the book in your hands as well as the headphones on your head; he will try to engage you in a conversation nonetheless. Pretending to be asleep is almost as uncomfortable than engaging in unbearable small-talk with him but it's still the better option. Resulting neck problems can be massaged away after the flight, brain damage due to the incessant babbling is irreversible. posted by Bunny at 4:11 AM


	Sunday, March 23, 2003 Product placement After watching this Friends episode (815) for the tenth time I feel the urge to try saltwater taffy. Phoebe [chewing on a green taffy]: "What the mothercrap is up with this stuff? Oh God, is it a gum, is it food?! What's the deal.... Oh it's nice, may I try a pink one?" Now I know that it's not made out of seawater but out of salted freshwater but they didn't tell me is where to get it outside of Atlantic City. I hope they sell taffy in San Francisco. posted by Bunny at 3:58 AM


	Saturday, March 22, 2003 Fire and Ice by Robert Frost SOME say the world will end in fire, Some say in ice. From what I've tasted of desire I hold with those who favor fire. But if it had to perish twice, I think I know enough of hate To know that for destruction ice Is also great And would suffice. posted by Bunny at 2:42 PM


	Friday, March 21, 2003 Sleep deprived I spent the last couple of days writing an essay for an economics class and didn't really know what to write. Abatement cost, time consistency, welfare, ... It wasn't hard to distract me so that I spent half of the night talking to my flatmate, reading blogs, online newspapers and stuff, calling people in California and New Zealand, chatting on ICQ. However I managed to finish the paper on time and handed it in one hour before the deadline. I haven't slept or eaten anything substantial for 36 hours and feel dizzy but I had the privilege of witnessing a pink sunrise on my cigarette break and drinking several litres of diet coke. Ah, student life, I'm back. posted by Bunny at 1:39 PM


	When I was young I probably don’t even qualify for a quarter-life crisis but I feel very old when I think back of the past. When you remember the fun things you used to do as a teenager, the epiphany strikes you that you can never do them again without losing the respect of your co-humans... e.g. food bets: October 1999. When we realized that beer wasn’t the only cheap thing in Prague, I bet with my best friend that I could eat more bigmacs than she could. She accepted the challenge and we entered a McDonald’s, bought two bigmacs and ate them, we bought two more and ate them, bought two more and ate them. The rate of chewing was decreasing. We bought two more. While we were forcing half of the burger down, RP suggested to call the bet off before we’d end up barfing in the blue-lit [= junkie-repellent] McDonald’s toilets. I had no objections. On the way home I said, "I think it was a bad idea to do the bet after having eaten dinner." posted by Bunny at 6:03 AM


	Thursday, March 20, 2003 Spring break It’s spring break time in the US and my boy-friend and his flatmate are on a road trip across California. Palm Springs – San Diego – LA, then back to San Francisco. He hasn’t called me since Sunday, so I was thinking along the line of the following scenarios: # 1: After a drunken night he woke up in Alaska and had to fight a bear or a moose. # 2: After a drunken night he met a movie star in Hollywood and they‘ve eloped. Presently, they’re in Las Vegas after getting married. # 3: After a drunken night he got mugged and the rental car was stolen in LA so that he now has no money to get back to San Francisco (or to call me). # 4: After a drunken night he joined the Foreign Legion to see more of the world. # 5: After a drunken night he decided that he was unsure of his sexuality and needed time to find himself and experiment more in San Francisco. posted by Bunny at 4:09 PM


	I just noticed Benson and Hedges' golden cigarette packets always remind me of Godiva Chocolate Boxes. posted by Bunny at 1:12 AM


	Wednesday, March 19, 2003 Why I will get killed before I die of a natural death I call people at 2 a.m. I slap people on their ass instead of saying hello I say "I wish I was dead." far too often I doodle on my friend's neck when I sit behind him during lectures When I'm in a bad mood, I don't want anyone to be happier than I am posted by Bunny at 3:34 AM


	Tuesday, March 18, 2003 On the phone with Auckland, NZ TJ: I am waiting for the care package of my mom. It's supposed to arrive any day now. Me: Oh, your mother hasn't send you any yet? TJ: No. I'm looking forward to getting the package...especially as I have run out of toothpaste. Me: Your mother is sending you toothpaste? Like they don't have any in New Zealand? TJ: Well, you know, I happen to like only one brand. The green... Me: Elmex. I remember it. TJ: And they don't sell it here. Me: What kind of a sissy just likes one brand of toothpaste? TJ: That's what I told myself and so I went out to buy some other toothpaste... but then it tasted so sweet! posted by Bunny at 4:48 AM


	Monday, March 17, 2003 Symbols John Brady Kiesling, a U.S. diplomat who couldn't "reconcile [his] conscience with [his] ability to represent the current U.S. Administration", resigned in February. Robin Cook, former British foreign secretary and the government's leader in the House of Commons, resigns his post today. So many courageous symbolic actions which only show that you can't change anything within the system anymore and that leaving it is the last resort. posted by Bunny at 8:31 PM


	Evil Nazis There are way too many dumb people in the world who misinterpret/misunderstand things in an offensive way. It would be amusing if it didn't lead to extremely negative conclusions about mankind in general. Please have a look at what I found in 883‘s guestbook: A person wrote: YOU FUCKIN' BITCH, I am german- but not a NAZI. IF YOU SAY THINGS LIKE HERE: http://www.883.artexgen.com/f_faq.htm you won't live long. mfg, "NAZI" My reply: @The guy who thinks that Kuki stated on this page that Germans are Nazis: Well my dear friend, you haven't quite gripped the concept of the faq page which stands for "frequently answered questions" if you don't know yet. This means that the things in bold letter are questions and statements from other people and that Kuki's answers are in normal print. Honestly, have you ever heard of such concepts as irony or sarcasm? Quick, look them up, they help to understand the world a little better. If you didn't get this, please let me know. I can write it out in German for you as well. posted by Bunny at 2:32 AM


	Sunday, March 16, 2003 Proof of masochism I sent an email to Merrill Lynch in order to apply for their summer internship program. What was I thinking? It’s a lose-lose-situation. I will either suffer immensely from being rejected (due to my bad personality or lack of talents) or I will suffer immensely from being their soulless slave for ten weeks during summer vacation. At least I haven't signed anything with my blood (yet). posted by Bunny at 9:35 PM


	*$/&%§!** A great swear word to be pronounced with a thick English accent: "daft prick" posted by Bunny at 8:20 PM


	Saturday, March 15, 2003 Trust nobody What my friend M. learned at her self defense class: “If you have the choice between walking home alone or together with a male friend at night, walk home alone. Every man is a potential rapist.” posted by Bunny at 10:25 PM


	Friday, March 14, 2003 Overreaction BBC weather forecast for today:"It will remain dry today with plenty of sunshine and the temperature will reach a high of 11C/52F this afternoon, though there will be a chilly easterly breeze." English people got very excited about the exceptional good weather, sat outside on the lawn and kept telling each other that summer was about to start. Coats and jackets were left at home. A girl wearing flipflops passed by. I heard a band play the "Muppet Show Theme Song" on campus. Side note: Today is Red Nose Day. posted by Bunny at 7:01 PM


	Thursday, March 13, 2003 A world gone mad I read a lot of posts in several discussion forums about politics and I got sick of the whole “Oh, me too, I have to voice my opinion”-shit. Everybody just gets polemic and tries to make his/her point of view look the coolest/smartest and at the end he/she walks away with an unchanged opinion and the conviction that all the others just don’t get how wrong they are. posted by Bunny at 8:25 PM


	Wednesday, March 12, 2003 Timezone confusion I’m fucked up. I get up at 2 p.m., go to lectures, have lunch at 7 p.m., have dinner at 4 a.m. At that time the birds have already begun to sing. And the sun is illuminating my room when I go to bed at 7 a.m. Physically I live with the Greenwich Mean Time but according to my biorhythm I am in the US. This is what happens when you get a flatrate, have long phone calls with your long distance relation and can’t sleep in the dark because you watched “The Ring”. I’m glad when I finally get to San Francisco where I can merge my physical with my mental time zone. This schizophrenic state of mind has to end. posted by Bunny at 7:09 PM


	Tuesday, March 11, 2003 Shopping bliss Went downtown together with AF. We just wanted to do a little grocery shopping but ended up checking out a second hand shop. I fell in love with a pair of flat dress shoes which were made out of the softest black leather ever to touch my feet. They were a size too small but I bought them anyway and a little black dress to match. Suddenly the apres-shopping euphoria kicked in and I was so happy that I spent even more money on food I didn't need. Materialism really gets you when grated cheese was all you intended to buy. posted by Bunny at 9:56 PM


	Fortune cookie message Behold the wisdom of the Tsingtao Beer fortune cookie: "Now’s the time to buy a truck or boat." [awestruck pause] Yeah, I really should do that... after I get my driver's license. A beer brand shouldn't encourage you to drive vehicles that can go faster than 5 mph anyway. posted by Bunny at 1:22 AM


	Monday, March 10, 2003 Band night I had no idea that Sunday night would turn into the "bands with names that suck or with no names at all" night... First band: They were introduced as "Three chums without a band name" due to the lack of a band name. It was nice down-to-earth rock but the band looked pained during its whole gig. Especially the drummer looked like he was badly in need of an appendectomy. Second band: "The band formerly known as 'Coast' and now known as 'Arigato' ". Choosing a Japanese word for a band name doesn't make you cool especially if your lead singer wears some sort of multicolored wool hat that's far too big for his little head. These guys played something that could have been labeled grunge if it had been music and not just noise. The guitar player randomly jumped up and down during the songs and the lead singer almost suffocated on the mike he was biting into. Third band: At least this band decided on a name and stuck to it. Moreover, the guitar player had a nice turquoise guitar and a matching shirt. They also brought along some groupies who were apparently bribed to applaud even though none of them threw a bra onto the stage. Their first song sucked, their second, too. Then K. bought me my second cider. The band instantly became better and even played a funny cover of "Hero" by Enrique Iglesias. I should have got drunk faster. posted by Bunny at 1:25 AM


	Sunday, March 09, 2003 Believe in the good in people Somebody used the last toilet paper. I hate my flatmates. posted by Bunny at 4:27 AM


	Love songs How come there's a myriad of love songs out in the universe? It seems to be a silly fixation on this worn-out subject that everyone has to go on and on and on about. Happy love, unhappy love, separated love, unfulfilled love, never-ending love, forbidden love, love until the end... yada yada yada. Now, losing their job or their keys, breaking their leg, the last hangover and the fauna are neglected issues that should not be forgotten. "Is it not strange that sheep's guts should hale souls out of men's bodies? - William Shakespeare (Much Ado about Nothing, act 2, sc. 3) posted by Bunny at 3:38 AM


	Saturday, March 08, 2003 Sense of humour I did it. The joke I posted is the current worst joke of the week in my favorite online magazine jetzt.de. posted by Bunny at 6:02 AM


	Friday, March 07, 2003 Non-material guy Just let go! This is the idea behind this project that is impressive because of its radical approach. We get rid of stuff we own eventually, replacing it by new things, always holding on to something. Some people just hold on to something without getting rid of anything. I once was a really bad case. As a memento hunter I would keep everything that could potentially remind me of something that I might want to remember; from a Parisian metro stub to the chopsticks which I used in a Chinese restaurant in Portugal. In the last year, I have cleaned out most of these things and feel relieved from a heavy load. Now all I really need fits in one suitcase. However, I still cling to a few things that are carefully packed away at my parents’ place (letters, photos and especially books). I guess I will carry those boxes through my whole life because I couldn’t do without them in the long run. Can you think of anything that compares to reading old letters on a rainy day? posted by Bunny at 7:33 PM


	Thursday, March 06, 2003 English Moment On a neatly trimmed but lusciously green campus lawn spots of yellow daffodils and white or blue crocusses are blooming. posted by Bunny at 9:02 PM


	Carnival Just read a sex confession in the Cosmo: This nice and normal guy fantasizes about having sex with Catwoman. So his nice and normal girlfriend surprises him with a nice and normal night at a hotel with Batman and Catwoman costumes. The nice and normal guy is really turned on by this and they have nice and normal sex in the costumes calling each other “Batman” and “Catwoman”. Just picture a guy, who gets a boner when his girlfriend giggles “Show me your Batmobil, Batman!”. posted by Bunny at 3:31 PM


	Wednesday, March 05, 2003 Taxation class I couldn't sleep tonight because images of "The Ring" (water, little girls with long hair, decayed arms, tv) kept creeping into my mind, no matter how hard I tried to think happy thoughts ("Friends", fluffy animals and the soundtrack of "Legally Blonde"). In the morning, the professor mainly talked about how disappointed he was that New Zealand lost against Australia in a football match and how the Swiss won the America's Cup. After listening to his intentions of burning the Swiss money he had in his wallet, I spent the rest of the class thinking about what meals I could prepare with the eggplant I bought two days ago. posted by Bunny at 11:28 AM


	Tuesday, March 04, 2003 Childhood memory # 1 It is time to get back to Nostalgialand. “Monty Python’s Flying Circus” wasn’t the only great British series. Anybody remember The Tripods aka Die dreibeinigen Herrscher? This Sci-Fi series caused a childhood trauma. Now it’s out on DVD. Don’t miss it! posted by Bunny at 4:24 PM


	Monday, March 03, 2003 Washing machines A1: I wonder why the European washing machines open sideways whereas the opening of American and Asian washing machines is on top. A2: I saw an Asian washing machine that had a label saying: ”Ratproof” Maybe rats don’t climb into them. But do they have a rat problem in the US, too? K.: It could be for ergonomic reasons? Maybe it’s bad for your back to kneel in front of a washing machine. A2: It’s as bad as leaning over the washing machine in order to reach into it. A1 [mimicking a Southern accent]: “We don’t kneel in front of no washing machines. We only kneel before God.” posted by Bunny at 3:21 AM


	Sunday, March 02, 2003 David Lynch Moment A couple of years ago: I borrowed a bike with a seat that was higher than the handle bar. Being a total disaster on two wheels, I managed to crash into a pole. My hands and knees were scratched. Due to the collision the chain on my bike had fallen off and grease mixed with my blood as I tried to get it back onto the bike. Then a one-armed mailman came and repaired it. posted by Bunny at 3:00 PM


	Saturday, March 01, 2003 Waiting for her to go to sleep It's a pretty awkward situation. While finishing my latest blog entry I overheard something that I probably wasn't supposed to hear. One of my flatmates and some guy (no clue who it was, I just heard him) made some kissing noises before he left. Unfortunately the front door is right next my room and the walls ain't thick. Now she's rummaging in the kitchen and I don't want to let her know that I know.... so I have to hold it until she goes to bed. Meanwhile I won't think about waterfalls, rainstorms, water dripping from the tap or the empty 2 litre coke bottle on my table. posted by Bunny at 6:41 AM


	I hate discussing politics at the dinner table I don't have anything against people that are opinionated... or maybe I do: "[...] Kofi Annan got his undergraduate degree in St. Paul, Minnesota. He received his master's degree from MIT. He's been employed by the UN since 1962. He was 24 at the time. We educated this guy and have supplied him a homeland and salary for 41 years, and he treats us [Americans] like vermin. Remember that." Europe and the rest of the world owes a lot to the US but this doesn't mean that they're America's vassals. There are no more contracts of homage and fealty. Feudalism is over, live with it. posted by Bunny at 6:00 AM

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