I am
...getting rained on in Tokyo.
...old enough to drink alcohol but not old enough to know when to stop.
...blogging since 02/22/03.
Saturday, November 29, 2003
"Team" might be an anagram of "mate" but that's the only connection to draw between those two terms Cursed be the person who thought that group work is more productive and advantageous for bonding between people. My current experiences show me that I must avoid teaming up with friends in future because otherwise there'll be no people left for me to like in this world.
Beef vs turkey There are no Thanksgiving induced feeding frenzies in my proximity as the concept of Thanksgiving has only been introduced to Germany recently (along with the adoption of Halloween) in order to get some money into the food producers' pockets. Unfortunately that still doesn't help with my weight. I need to find a substitute for my current comfort food (Argentinean steaks).
Turn up the volume This is the perfect gift for anyone who has a shower: a waterproof radio with built-in soap dispenser. It has everything: design and functionality. So, what's the color of liquid soap again?
Sometimes you don't really know what you're looking for but find the right thing anyway by looking for the wrong thing The search query "ethical consulting" on the site of The Economist gave me a link of an article on sleep deprivation.
Competition I was on campus from 8 am to 9:30 pm. Most of the time was study-related but the last two hours were spent for a good cause instead of thinking of new ways to exploit mankind: blood donation. It turned out that the fact that TS had spent his first four years of his life in an African country automatically makes his blood undesirable for the Red Cross. So TJ and I had to donate blood by ourselves. During the 15 minutes we lay there with needles up our arms we amused ourselves by doing a blood donating race. TJ's blood was much more eager to leave his body so he won the race by having filled the 1/2 liter bag one minute ahead of me. Stupid slow blood of mine.
Why do I only score good at tests that require a twisted perception of the world? I have no idea how other countries handle that kind of stuff but here in Germany we have to pass a multiple choice test that covers the theoretical parts of driving school. The answers are pure common sense if you happen to live in a world where children and senior citizens hide behind parking cars in order to jump at you when you drive by them and where foreigners might suddenly stop or do a U-turn because they lack any sense of orientation. It's also a world in which you always successfully suppress feelings of anger or agression and where you always have a trailer attached to your car. As you might have guessed, I didn't only pass but also scored a full 100%.
One necklace to rule them all Yesterday we seniors had fake job interviews with recruiters from real companies who gave us feedback afterwards. I thought I should blend with the crowd so I wore the official female business student distinctive mark: a pearl necklace that has long led an obscure life in my drawer during my youth.
I had one abysmal and one good job interview. That's not so bad when I come to think that I chose two companies that I wasn't really interested in. The not so good one was with an investment bank. But what really scares me is that the consultants (the good interview) actually liked me. I have no other explanation for that than the magic qualities of the pearl necklace that took them in. After the interview, I took it off again because I feared that the pearl's power might stem from evil sources. It's just like a real life version of Sauron's ring, only girlier.
My Superego isn't any fun My Superego has shackled my Id with extra-strong iron chains and then thrown it into a deep dungeon guarded by a bad-tempered dragon that's suffering insomnia. I realize that every time when I dream of hot male models and then refrain from ripping their clothes of because the thought "I have a boyfriend" hits me.
Lifestyle's vengeance After two weeks of suffering a permanent gag reflex I finally concede that living off diet coke and an average of 4 hours of sleep per night is not good for my physical well-being (I've never been sure about ever having mental health in the first place so there are no conclusions to draw in that area). My anxiety and frustration decided to collaborate to produce a gigantic wave of acid, ready to burn my stomach into oblivion. That's a bad case of monsters turning against their creator: If I'm quick enough to get a gastroscopy I might be able to make a movie as good as Frankenstein.
More roomie disaster When it comes to the bathroom I think I prefer guys as roomies instead of girls. Guys do not own excessive amounts of body scrubs, shampoos, conditioners, shaving cream, etc. that they will place in the minuscule shower. And what is more: despite the fact that males may not aim correctly when peeing they will never leave used ladies' sanitary products lying around. That wasn't a pretty sight this morning.
A Sunday with my evil finance professor who'd rather play golf than ask mean questions but continues to do so nonetheless It's not enjoyable to sit in a 6 hour seminar on a sunny Sunday even if somebody shouts "Shit" in front of the professor because that somebody messed up his presentation.
Heretics at work If you wonder why I haven't shared my daily adventures with you for the last couple of days: the real world temporarily offered more fun than the internet. I was captured by the magic of a badass new-age bird lady painting jigsaw puzzle of 2000 pieces and with a range of 1 million different colors. Having completed 30% of it, I have officially reached a new level of geekiness. I can actually feel that more and more items in my wardrobe are turning plaid slowly this minute.
After this brief vacation from my existence as a wretched business student, I will now turn to making a powerpoint presentation for a seminar on Sunday - yes Sunday, the day on which God would smite anyone who mumbles empty business phrases instead of prayers if we were to live in biblical times. But we are not so we heretics go without any major punishment such as a swarm of locusts. The only thing that plagued me is a bunch of fruitflies in the apartment which are more likely a side-effect of the recent vindemiation than of divine discontent.
Diet coke and the night from hell This morning I had to write an exam. After the stress of the past week there was neither time nor motivation left to study so I considered slamming my head against a wall real hard so that a doctor could diagnose a concussion. Then I reconsidered. To incapacitate my brain functions permanently would probably offset the advantage I'll have from taking the exam later.
Nothing beats good old-fashioned studying until dawn in a caffeine-spurred panic.
Plants, our chlorophyllous friends I just noticed that I'm not really into decorating the apartment with plants and as a result I don't have any in my bedroom. All of the other rooms are invaded by them because my room mates don't share my view. I don't deny that it's nice to know that you're not the only living organism present in the room but it just isn't worth the effort. Same thing goes for pets and kids (who don't even produce any oxygen).
How can it be fun when you don't feel sick afterwards? These were horrible two days. Stuck in a conference room, listening to presentations from 9 am to 7 pm, presenting a social theory that I didn't understand in the first place, no internet access....
Friday night I didn't feel up to bonding by playing drinking games with the professors, so I went to the nearby fair and released my inner child who made me ride the chairoplane and other rides, walk through a tunnel of horror and eat a lollipop which made popping noises. That night I was reminded of how you can feel sick without being dead drunk.
