I am
...getting rained on in Tokyo.
...old enough to drink alcohol but not old enough to know when to stop.
...blogging since 02/22/03.


Wednesday, December 31, 2003

... and a happy new year!
New Year's Eve is the night when tradition bids you to light firecrackers and fireworks to drive away evil spirits. However the recent empowerment movement of the evil spirits has reclaimed the firecrackers. Impatient as evil spirits can be they usually don't wait until 12 am but currently are firing away eagerly. Nothing adds more to the celebration than war-like sounds of explosion.


posted by Bunny at 3:16 PM



Tuesday, December 30, 2003

When you think it's over, you still have 20 minutes to watch but that's ok because I went to the bathroom during intermission
Just watched The Return of the King. I liked it most of the time despite my headache though I never thought of Sauron as a giant vagina in a lighthouse but that's the director's artistic freedom, I guess.


posted by Bunny at 1:09 AM



Monday, December 29, 2003

Don't you just love Asian mothers?
The joy of spending money that should have been saved for more important things was reduced when my mom commented on my new rugby shirt-like wool sweater: "Horizontal stripes make people look fat." But then again, I've really gotten fat so there's really no point blaming the sweater.


posted by Bunny at 5:35 PM



Friday, December 26, 2003

Fun with photos
Met with a childhood friend in Essen, one of the rare places in Germany with a Starbucks. You can tell me all about evil capitalist empire builders but I'm a sucker for Caramel Macchiato. The last time I had a Starbucks coffee was in Singapore and it was some weird concoction with coffee-flavored jelly cubes in it, so you can imagine how I looked forward to getting my favorite hot beverage. Starbucks was closed. But I still got that special warm feeling inside later on when my friend and I were browsing through some old pictures from our past. How could I forget that we used to wear some seriously dorky clothes in the 80s and 90s? Not to mention my "I'm your evil middle school teacher from hell"-glasses. I bow to the inventors of the contact lens.


posted by Bunny at 10:29 PM



Wednesday, December 24, 2003

Merry Christmas to everyone!
The good thing about being a heathen who will sooner or later burn in hell is that you can choose your personal degree of involvement with Christmas. When I'm up to it, I don't only eat Christmas cookies, give Christmas presents and sing carols but also expose myself to hypothermia in church. This year I really don't feel like doing any of these activities so I'd rather surf the internet which is unusually fast as the majority of Germany is stuck at Christmas dinner with the whole family. And don't you tell me that I'm missing out on anything fun. I know that you're lying.


posted by Bunny at 9:44 PM



Monday, December 22, 2003

What I did during my Christmas vacation
If I was a prep I'd be writing: "I just did some random shopping at the mall and got myself the cutest Louis Vuitton bag in the world. You know, like, it's so small that a lipstick won't fit in there but it totally matches my new Prada shoes." but instead my idea of a relaxed day is lying in bed and watching the entire series of Flame of Recca (42 episodes) in one go. It's an anime about a boy who has flames shooting out of his hand and therefore has to fight the forces of evil. As the natural law of anime wills it, he enters a martial combat tournament after the first half of the series which means there's not a lot of storyline left but a lotta fighting scenes. At least I practiced my Japanese a little so that I now know the word for "Idiot". Well, that's a lie. I've known the word for "Idiot" since watching Neon Genesis Evangelion. Somebody please shoot my inner nerd.


posted by Bunny at 9:30 PM



Saturday, December 20, 2003

Whoa, that was a close one!
I need to get some rest. No seriously, I really do need to get some rest. Yesterday was the day after the last exam so we had brunch at a friend's place. She scheduled it at 11 am so that was more of a breakfast than lunch but we showed up one hour late anyway. It was a nice cozy event and then I almost accidently kissed TJ instead of TS. That was a very traumatic incident but can you blame me for it? I was tired and stressed out and TJ and TS are roomies and both of their names start with a T and their both have blond hair and almost the same haircut and height and so on. Good excuse?


posted by Bunny at 5:57 PM



Friday, December 19, 2003

Subject: birthday
I’m for people giving you presents when they feel like it and not when they have to. In the course of a year people usually stumble over a couple of objects their friends would love to have, but they don’t buy them because their friends’ birthdays are months away. On their friends’ birthdays however they will have forgotten about that and buy a generic Hallmark card with an attached gift certificate for a dinner because they didn’t find anything clever. Their friends will pretend that they are delighted by the presents and make a mental note on giving them something as crappy in return. Your birthday shouldn’t be about you anyway. After all, it wasn’t you who had the inconvenience of squeezing an oversized head through a cervix that dilated a mere 10 cm that day.


posted by Bunny at 11:07 AM



Wednesday, December 17, 2003

It's like Waterworld, when you replace "water" with "concrete"
There was some fun action today at the construction site in front of TS' apartment. They brought a giant machine which covered the whole courtyard with tons of wet concrete so that people can only access their apartments by walking over a couple of planks just like in Waterworld. Except that Kevin Costner can't breathe under this shit, not even with gills.


posted by Bunny at 8:58 PM



Tuesday, December 16, 2003

The beauty of being krill
Nothing extraordinary going on here. It's cold and rainy, there's too much work to do and I haven't bought a single X-mas present so far. Sometimes I manage to scare Tupperware girl when we bump into each other accidentally in the badly-lighted hall. I watch TV shows on MTV which market Chelsea Clinton as one of the sexy celebrity bachelorettes out there. TS is humming the tune to "I feel pretty" which clashes with me singing "Copacabana" in my head. These are the moments I wish I was some krill floating in the ocean with nothing more to worry about than being eaten by a whale.

Addendum: TJ was enraged that I stole his idea of "wanting to be plankton floating in the sea" for this post. Therefore I hereby officially state that this was his idea and not mine. Frankly I'd prefer to be dead instead of being krill but this was the only way to use "krill" in a post. Maybe I should name my first-born "Krill" so that I can use the word more often without being accused of stealing anybody's intellectual property.


posted by Bunny at 10:33 PM



Monday, December 15, 2003

Thoughts that sneak into my studious mind at 4 am
  • Have I become immune to caffeine?
  • Krill is a beautiful word and it's a shame that it's underused.
  • Why have I been singing Copacabana constantly for the last four hours?
  • It's too bad that I'm too stressed out to visit a shrink with whom I can discuss my stress-related issues.


    posted by Bunny at 9:59 PM



    • Friday, December 12, 2003

    The perfect gift
    Today TS gave me an early Christmas present: a punching ball which looks somewhat like this except that TS has taped a portrait of his onto it so that I could vent my anger by whacking the punching ball instead of him. The gal on the picture isn't me but if you took away the pigtails and the smile and if you were about 50 feet away and squinted, that's what I would look like. Unfortunately the boxing gloves that came along with it were too small so that all that bare-hand fistfighting made my knuckles hurt. However this won't stop me from putting it to good use in future. That's the good side of Christmas, the bad one is that I don't know how I will ever find a present comparable in coolness to that punching ball for my sweetheart.


    posted by Bunny at 8:05 PM



    Thursday, December 11, 2003

    What only goes onto the lips doesn't make you fatter
    My theory: Buying lipsticks whose shades are named after food like "very cherry", "dark chocolate" or "glossy plum" is probably a compensation for being on diet.


    posted by Bunny at 10:44 PM



    Wednesday, December 10, 2003

    The non-fun part of social interaction
    It's almost 2 am and another day filled with anger for and resentment of my fellow students has just ended. I already mentioned in the blog that I will never do group assignments with friends again but I have to rectify my statement: I will never ever in my life do any group assignment of any kind be it together with friends or a nemesis. I don't want a job working in a team on a project, I need control over the end result which will not be ruined by some morons who don't do their job properly. Then I will gladly take the blame for anything I screwed up myself. But right now I'm just angry that the person in charge of proof-reading didn't do their job and didn't even correct the typo "Honk Kong" (one of many). Honk indeed. Honk if you're incompetent.


    posted by Bunny at 2:01 AM



    Tuesday, December 09, 2003

    The fun part of sports
    TS keeps wearing these shorts that he got for his basketball team in high school. His coach appears to be of the sadistic kind who made sure that the tushy area of the shorts say "Play hard" when he ordered them for the team. This must have been the laughing stock of the their opponents but it could have been worse. Just imagine the writing printed on the front of the shorts.


    posted by Bunny at 5:08 PM



    Sunday, December 07, 2003

    Ho ho ho help, Santa's clinging to a rope
    The forebodings of Christmas are everywhere. I got a Christmas songs CD from the Red Cross for my blood, there's a Christmas tree on campus and very Christmassy but seldom tasteful decoration of gaudy lights in the shop windows. And don't forget the displays of nativity scenes with plastic figurines.
    But the worst thing among Christmas decoration monstrosities is the 4-feet tall Santa Claus doll hanging outside of many people's windows. It looks like a eight-year old burglar or a suicide that didn't really know what to do with the rope. If that's what people think Christmas should look like I better lock myself at home and drown my winter depression with a lot of mulled wine.


    posted by Bunny at 11:29 PM



    Saturday, December 06, 2003

    Every cloud has a silver lining
    Even though my bike is broken now and has no prospects of being repaired any time soon there's a positive side to it. From now on I don't have to walk to the bike shed which is situated across the street. When it's dark it always gives me the creeps to walk there because there's no proper lightning so that I basically unlock the door to the shed in total darkness, feel around for my bike and imagine that the door will slam shut any minute so that the multitude of monsters that inhabit that eerie place can feast on my flesh and bones. Adding to this rather immaterial menace, there is the more realistic threat of stepping into dog poo on the way out as the path leading to the shed is the unofficial toilet for the dogs of the neighborhood. Life's going to be much safer for me...and my shoes.


    posted by Bunny at 11:21 PM



    Thursday, December 04, 2003

    Walking life
    Yesterday my bike pedal broke. There was no one-armed mailman to repair it (that happened to me once). So I am reduced to a mere walker. I need to get that driver's licence fast.


    posted by Bunny at 3:05 PM



    Monday, December 01, 2003

    Three's company?
    Tupperware girl's back from her 1-week "self-declared fall break" trip to NY, the city she deems to be the most wonderful place in the world. NY is not that bad but I precautionarily moved to TS' apartment in case she has "Thanksgiving in NY"-stories to share. My contingency of patience for this year had already been depleted during this weekend. She also brought a poster from the Metropolitan Museum because she seems to have an inexplicable urge to decorate the living room which she only enters to water her plant, the other decorative item she's already placed in that room.
    As you can see I'm not in a good mood.

    Did I already mentioned that the poster depicts faces of people that were shot?


    posted by Bunny at 8:40 PM





    Always look on the bright side of life
    Working life can't be worse than working from 10 am to 5 am. On group assignments. On a Sunday. Two wrongs really don't make a right. But my internet connection now is much faster than it is during the day.


    posted by Bunny at 5:18 AM



    Saturday, November 29, 2003

    "Team" might be an anagram of "mate" but that's the only connection to draw between those two terms
    Cursed be the person who thought that group work is more productive and advantageous for bonding between people. My current experiences show me that I must avoid teaming up with friends in future because otherwise there'll be no people left for me to like in this world.


    posted by Bunny at 4:58 PM



    Friday, November 28, 2003

    Beef vs turkey
    There are no Thanksgiving induced feeding frenzies in my proximity as the concept of Thanksgiving has only been introduced to Germany recently (along with the adoption of Halloween) in order to get some money into the food producers' pockets. Unfortunately that still doesn't help with my weight. I need to find a substitute for my current comfort food (Argentinean steaks).


    posted by Bunny at 10:18 PM



    Tuesday, November 25, 2003

    Turn up the volume
    This is the perfect gift for anyone who has a shower: a waterproof radio with built-in soap dispenser. It has everything: design and functionality. So, what's the color of liquid soap again?


    posted by Bunny at 10:54 AM



    Saturday, November 22, 2003

    Sometimes you don't really know what you're looking for but find the right thing anyway by looking for the wrong thing
    The search query "ethical consulting" on the site of The Economist gave me a link of an article on sleep deprivation.


    posted by Bunny at 6:49 PM



    Thursday, November 20, 2003

    Competition
    I was on campus from 8 am to 9:30 pm. Most of the time was study-related but the last two hours were spent for a good cause instead of thinking of new ways to exploit mankind: blood donation. It turned out that the fact that TS had spent his first four years of his life in an African country automatically makes his blood undesirable for the Red Cross. So TJ and I had to donate blood by ourselves. During the 15 minutes we lay there with needles up our arms we amused ourselves by doing a blood donating race. TJ's blood was much more eager to leave his body so he won the race by having filled the 1/2 liter bag one minute ahead of me. Stupid slow blood of mine.


    posted by Bunny at 11:10 PM



    Monday, November 17, 2003

    Why do I only score good at tests that require a twisted perception of the world?
    I have no idea how other countries handle that kind of stuff but here in Germany we have to pass a multiple choice test that covers the theoretical parts of driving school. The answers are pure common sense if you happen to live in a world where children and senior citizens hide behind parking cars in order to jump at you when you drive by them and where foreigners might suddenly stop or do a U-turn because they lack any sense of orientation. It's also a world in which you always successfully suppress feelings of anger or agression and where you always have a trailer attached to your car. As you might have guessed, I didn't only pass but also scored a full 100%.


    posted by Bunny at 9:27 PM



    Sunday, November 16, 2003

    One necklace to rule them all
    Yesterday we seniors had fake job interviews with recruiters from real companies who gave us feedback afterwards. I thought I should blend with the crowd so I wore the official female business student distinctive mark: a pearl necklace that has long led an obscure life in my drawer during my youth.
    I had one abysmal and one good job interview. That's not so bad when I come to think that I chose two companies that I wasn't really interested in. The not so good one was with an investment bank. But what really scares me is that the consultants (the good interview) actually liked me. I have no other explanation for that than the magic qualities of the pearl necklace that took them in. After the interview, I took it off again because I feared that the pearl's power might stem from evil sources. It's just like a real life version of Sauron's ring, only girlier.


    posted by Bunny at 11:41 AM



    Thursday, November 13, 2003

    My Superego isn't any fun
    My Superego has shackled my Id with extra-strong iron chains and then thrown it into a deep dungeon guarded by a bad-tempered dragon that's suffering insomnia. I realize that every time when I dream of hot male models and then refrain from ripping their clothes of because the thought "I have a boyfriend" hits me.


    posted by Bunny at 9:53 PM



    Wednesday, November 12, 2003

    Lifestyle's vengeance
    After two weeks of suffering a permanent gag reflex I finally concede that living off diet coke and an average of 4 hours of sleep per night is not good for my physical well-being (I've never been sure about ever having mental health in the first place so there are no conclusions to draw in that area). My anxiety and frustration decided to collaborate to produce a gigantic wave of acid, ready to burn my stomach into oblivion. That's a bad case of monsters turning against their creator: If I'm quick enough to get a gastroscopy I might be able to make a movie as good as Frankenstein.


    posted by Bunny at 4:36 PM



    Monday, November 10, 2003

    More roomie disaster
    When it comes to the bathroom I think I prefer guys as roomies instead of girls. Guys do not own excessive amounts of body scrubs, shampoos, conditioners, shaving cream, etc. that they will place in the minuscule shower. And what is more: despite the fact that males may not aim correctly when peeing they will never leave used ladies' sanitary products lying around. That wasn't a pretty sight this morning.


    posted by Bunny at 7:49 PM



    Sunday, November 09, 2003

    A Sunday with my evil finance professor who'd rather play golf than ask mean questions but continues to do so nonetheless
    It's not enjoyable to sit in a 6 hour seminar on a sunny Sunday even if somebody shouts "Shit" in front of the professor because that somebody messed up his presentation.


    posted by Bunny at 10:38 PM



    Friday, November 07, 2003

    Heretics at work
    If you wonder why I haven't shared my daily adventures with you for the last couple of days: the real world temporarily offered more fun than the internet. I was captured by the magic of a badass new-age bird lady painting jigsaw puzzle of 2000 pieces and with a range of 1 million different colors. Having completed 30% of it, I have officially reached a new level of geekiness. I can actually feel that more and more items in my wardrobe are turning plaid slowly this minute.
    After this brief vacation from my existence as a wretched business student, I will now turn to making a powerpoint presentation for a seminar on Sunday - yes Sunday, the day on which God would smite anyone who mumbles empty business phrases instead of prayers if we were to live in biblical times. But we are not so we heretics go without any major punishment such as a swarm of locusts. The only thing that plagued me is a bunch of fruitflies in the apartment which are more likely a side-effect of the recent vindemiation than of divine discontent.


    posted by Bunny at 7:26 PM



    Tuesday, November 04, 2003

    Diet coke and the night from hell
    This morning I had to write an exam. After the stress of the past week there was neither time nor motivation left to study so I considered slamming my head against a wall real hard so that a doctor could diagnose a concussion. Then I reconsidered. To incapacitate my brain functions permanently would probably offset the advantage I'll have from taking the exam later.
    Nothing beats good old-fashioned studying until dawn in a caffeine-spurred panic.


    posted by Bunny at 12:26 AM



    Sunday, November 02, 2003

    Plants, our chlorophyllous friends
    I just noticed that I'm not really into decorating the apartment with plants and as a result I don't have any in my bedroom. All of the other rooms are invaded by them because my room mates don't share my view. I don't deny that it's nice to know that you're not the only living organism present in the room but it just isn't worth the effort. Same thing goes for pets and kids (who don't even produce any oxygen).


    posted by Bunny at 10:25 PM



    Saturday, November 01, 2003

    How can it be fun when you don't feel sick afterwards?
    These were horrible two days. Stuck in a conference room, listening to presentations from 9 am to 7 pm, presenting a social theory that I didn't understand in the first place, no internet access....
    Friday night I didn't feel up to bonding by playing drinking games with the professors, so I went to the nearby fair and released my inner child who made me ride the chairoplane and other rides, walk through a tunnel of horror and eat a lollipop which made popping noises. That night I was reminded of how you can feel sick without being dead drunk.


    posted by Bunny at 8:44 PM



    Thursday, October 30, 2003

    Back to the past
    The ugly reminiscence of school trips with the awkward social interaction between students and teachers has barely faded from my mature university student's memory when it all comes back with a vengeance. From Thursday evening till Saturday afternoon I will be stuck in a youth hostel somewhere in South Germany where a mandatory seminar on international management takes place. It seems that this is part of the chair's idea of creating a stronger bond between the students of international management students and the academic staff. So far I feel no such thing, only a slight inclination to pour some rat poison into the food of those who stole my weekend.


    posted by Bunny at 3:15 PM



    Tuesday, October 28, 2003

    I'd stick to steaks and hamburgers
    One Texan prisoner listed "Justice, Equality, World Peace", another "Justice, Temperance, with Mercy" as his final meal request. Stupid idea. If Justice was edible it would probably taste like cod-liver oil.


    posted by Bunny at 5:39 PM



    Monday, October 27, 2003

    Last resort
    About four years ago a new building was built on campus. It has been financed by some sponsors so the university almost got it for free; but still, it is an architectural abomination. When they built it they forgot to include the planned elevator, it is huge but only five classrooms fit in it because they wasted a lot of space on some big hall which is rarely used for something else but examination. The worst thing is that the ventilation doesn't work properly in those classrooms with no windows.
    Today I spent three hours in one of those hot and stuffy rooms. After a sleepless night caffeine and sugar weren't keeping me awake anymore so I thought pain would do the job and I started pricking my palm with a pen for a while. It didn't really work though because I couldn't apply enough pressure to make it hurt enough when I dozed off. There must be another solution to free myself from my narcoleptic-like state... Now, where do I get one of those oxygen tanks?


    posted by Bunny at 6:41 PM



    Friday, October 24, 2003

    Relax
    TS' tenosynovitis still hasn't gotten any better so that I hadn't been massaged for at least three months. When I complained to him about it and my sore back, he surprised me with an appointment with a professional masseuse. That was really sweet of him. I enjoyed it a lot except for the part during which I was supposed to "warm up" under a red heat lamp which made me feel like I was a roast chicken that was kept warm. Memo to my future married self: Nagging gets you what you want.


    posted by Bunny at 6:47 PM





    Sleeping is no good for my cognitive processes
    I woke up while being under the impression that it's pouring outside before I remembered that my bedroom is next to the shower.


    posted by Bunny at 10:38 AM



    Thursday, October 23, 2003

    Talking to myself
    Whenever I walk a certain footpath on campus I automatically say "I hate this university". I must be responding unconsciously to a key stimulus that is placed there somewhere. It might be the fake castle ruin on campus or the decaying leaves on the ground. Or maybe it's a moment of clarity bestowed on me by a rush of fresh oxygen in-between the carbon dioxide filled classes.


    posted by Bunny at 4:38 PM



    Wednesday, October 22, 2003

    Recurring theme
    Sleeping is supposed to be restful but for the last week I only managed to come up with incoherent dreams in which I have to complete random and unmanageable tasks, such as diversifying a securities portfolio or giving birth to a baby. This semester hasn't been good so far.


    posted by Bunny at 6:12 PM



    Tuesday, October 21, 2003

    Rethinking my options
    Maybe my career aspirations are misled after all. I proofread a friend's paper and realized that I take immense pleasure in detecting other people's mistakes. Teacher should be an extremely satisfying job for me.


    posted by Bunny at 3:46 PM



    Sunday, October 19, 2003

    The joys of sharing an apartment
    I have the urge to get a hotel room so that I can steal a lot of "do not disturb"-signs. They might come in handy in our little apartment. Sometimes 100 m2 don't countervail against treading on someone's toes.


    posted by Bunny at 8:11 PM



    Thursday, October 16, 2003

    That's why I don't like marketing
    The powerpoint presentation of some VP from a major consultancy who held a lecture at the university yesterday was everything one expects from a consultant. It had lots of graphics in it with squares, pyramids, circles and arrows in it and the word strategy was randomly sprinkled on the slides. At the end, the current recruiting ad of the consultancy was projected onto the screen and stayed projected for the 30 min Q&A session during which I was bothered by the slogan of the ad. Roughly translated it said "To think is to act" which ranks among the top 10 of meaningless brain puke that was conceived by an adman whose imagination has been smothered by his coke-addiction.
    Using the same schema this guy would consequently come up with more crap such as "Yellow is green" or "Beach is mountain". I hope his nose explodes before such monstrosities take shape.


    posted by Bunny at 5:04 PM



    Wednesday, October 15, 2003

    And what does this teach me?
    Isn't it sad that I have a lecture taught by a guy whose nickname is Gianni even though his real name starts with a C? He only got the nickname due to his preference for Versace clothing.


    posted by Bunny at 10:15 AM



    Monday, October 13, 2003

    Geez, that's good to know...
    I've already told you about TJ's, TS' and my little measurement frenzy. The latest findings show that I can put my whole fist into my mouth. Not until my wrist but the knuckles are no problem.


    posted by Bunny at 10:38 PM





    IPO
    Okay guys, who of you listed me on BlogShares? I want names!


    posted by Bunny at 10:22 PM



    Sunday, October 12, 2003

    Laziness is what I am
    As this is the last year of my studies, I thought I should profit from the free coaching program that our university offers. I sort of imagined my coach to be some elderly businessman who hands out his pearls of wisdom to whoever is willing to listen while walking through a very inspirational landscape. Instead I got to sit with some hot guy in his 30s in a very uninspiring office at university. Unfortunately his hotness didn't prevent me from losing what little dignity I had so that I spent the coaching session happily abusing him as my shrink. In the end, he gave me a "to do"-list for me to complete until our next session in November. It's seems to be a lot of work to get one's life straightened out. Maybe I should just stay the dysfunctional, confused, and disoriented person that I am.


    posted by Bunny at 7:37 PM



    Saturday, October 11, 2003

    Uhm...thank you so much...I...uh..you're so...really great...
    After the state of emergency of the last few days (deadline for the another paper from hell), I can finally sleep, take a shower, shave, and eat real food again.
    There's a post office in Berlin that's open until midnight and therefore it was my last resort for meeting the deadline (you can send your paper by mail as long as the envelope has a stamp with today's date on it). The problem was that I'm more than 500 km away from Berlin. That's when I started to appreciate the power of the brotherhood of procrastinators. A friend who lives in Berlin skipped a party for me so that he could print out the final version of my paper I sent him via email, put it into an envelope and go to the post office. Procrastinators stick together. I was overflowing with gratitude so I would have started a diffuse "thank you"-speech if I hadn't been unable to form a complete sentence due to sleep deprivation.


    posted by Bunny at 12:54 AM



    Wednesday, October 08, 2003

    Fun with tape measure
    In order to procrastinate some super important stuff, TJ, TS and I took random body measurements (no, not that body parts... for guys, ignorance can be real bliss). TS has a slightly larger chest that TJ but in all other body measurements (arm length, index finger, etc.) TJ was the winner. However, I had a wider mouth than TS and TJ (6 cm). Please don't start speculating on the implications this has...


    posted by Bunny at 6:25 PM



    Tuesday, October 07, 2003

    Today's lessons
    #1: It's a definite turn-off when I squint while kissing.
    #2: Books on sociology are filled with phrases like "How can I know what I think before I see what I say?".


    posted by Bunny at 11:56 PM



    Monday, October 06, 2003

    Metrosexuals at play
    TJ and TS started an argument about whose shower gel was better and ended up standing in the bathroom demonstrating the foam properties of each shower gel for the girls to judge.


    posted by Bunny at 10:06 PM



    Sunday, October 05, 2003

    Random whining
    Whenever I openly regret my decision to study at this slave driver of a business school, my dear friends try to console me and tell me that at least I'm not stuck with an immensely boring mediocre job. What they do not bear in mind is that the most probable job options after graduation include either working with excel or powerpoint on a 16h/day basis for the rest of my life (assuming, of course, that there's a company mad enough to hire me...otherwise I'll just be a jobless person with burnout syndrom). Fun galore!


    posted by Bunny at 11:30 PM



    Saturday, October 04, 2003

    Jealousy about food
    At breakfast.
    Me: I don't want my roll.
    TJ: Then I'll take it! [takes it]
    Me: I changed my mind. I want my roll!
    TJ: No, you can't have it back, it's mine.
    [He licks one side of the roll and hands it back to me]
    Me: Ha! If you think that this will entitle you to the roll, then...
    [I lick another part of the roll]
    TJ: Eww, how gross is that?... Nevermind, I'll eat it anyway.
    [TJ puts it on his plate, I cough onto the roll]
    TJ: You're sick!
    Me: Serves you right!
    TS: Hey guys, if you aren't eating it, give it to me...


    posted by Bunny at 5:23 PM



    Friday, October 03, 2003

    It'll never be the same
    In the middle of a medium depression I recreated the maternal womb with a large blanket under which I wanted to spend the rest of the day striking a fetal pose. However TS ruined it for me by poking his head in to say 'Hi'.


    posted by Bunny at 7:32 PM



    Wednesday, October 01, 2003

    Job fair
    It's really painful to lead a conversation with HR people that stand around their colorful yet professional booths. You want to have a conversation long enough to entitle you to take their giveaways (which range from the standard plastic pen with company logo to bags full of cosmetics samples) but this requires you to make them keep talking by asking them numerous questions. All these little packages of candy and peppermints they hand out.... it's like carnival.


    posted by Bunny at 5:37 PM



    Monday, September 29, 2003

    Run Annie run
    I had to hand in a paper at the examination office. Because I missed the opening hours of the examination office some of my fellow last minute paper writers and me sped on the autobahn in order to send the paper at the post office at the Frankfurt airport because it's open until 9 p.m. We ran the whole way from the parking block to the post office. If I hadn't been out of breath I would have laughed hysterically at the resemblence to the amazing race. Sleep deprivation isn't pretty.


    posted by Bunny at 11:30 PM



    Saturday, September 27, 2003

    You got mail
    Recipient: FutureMe
    Date: 09/27/2013
    Subject: Hi there! (Do not delete, this is no spam!)

    Dear FutureMe,

    I wish the email-writing thing would also work the other way around so that you could tell me what to say when someone asks “Where do you picture yourself in ten years?“ in a job interview. But obviously this would tear up the fabric of time and space, the world would explode and the apocalyptic riders would come and bring death, famine, pestilence and war among us ... except for the fact that the latter already happened. As I am left without the means to destroy the universe as we know it, I will try to keep you entertained by telling you what I think will happen in ten years from 2003.
    [job interview version] In ten years from now I picture myself in a high management position abroad. After working for a couple of years, I completed my dissertation in less than a year, so that people had to call me doctor and respect me despite the fact that I am young and female. I have a loving family with an overly bright kid which does calculus while watching Sesame Street and a husband that supports my career, i.e. cooks and does the laundry. By marrying I got rid of my unpronounceable family name which made introductions a terrible ordeal. Combined with the fact that I changed my first name so that my correspondence isn’t addressed to “Mr.” all the time, I will have the positive side-effect that none of the people that I knew in the past can track me down and beg for money because they chose to be poor scientists or artists. So life's pretty good if it weren't for the dependency on valium.[/job interview version]
    And now the “What I really think will happen”-version:
    [real version] In ten years emails will be obsolete. Therefore you, FutureMe, will never get this little letter. You, however, will not be bothered by never receiving this email because there will be a lot of robots which serve your every need and desire (... well, maybe not every desire...). Moreover, robots also do all the thinking for mankind so that you can just hang out in your massage chair and do nothing more than to exist. Lucky bastard. [/real version]

    Yours faithfully, Annie


    posted by Bunny at 7:29 PM



    Thursday, September 25, 2003

    Taking the sauce out of life
    Life in a village means that you have to drive to another, slightly bigger village to eat at McDonald's. Today I had the rare cosmopolitan experience of eating there. I ordered a McRib, something I hadn't eaten in maybe more than five years. In my memories the McRib is a lump of food drenched with BBQ sauce so that a wet towel automatically comes along with the order. You probably can imagine my amazement when the vendor didn't put a wet towel on my tray. When I opened the McRib box, I found a rib-shaped pork patty in a bun. There were hints of sauce in the center of the burger but nothing capable of besmearing my whole face and torso.
    You know you're old when the act of eating will never be messy again. It won't take long and I will carry around my personal set of fork and knife so that I will never have to touch food with my hands again.


    posted by Bunny at 11:00 PM



    Wednesday, September 24, 2003

    Not my biggest problem but ...
    Now that I've discovered my second favorite condiment next to chili sauce, I have to find out what I can eat with instant sauce hollandaise besides asparagus.


    posted by Bunny at 8:53 PM



    Tuesday, September 23, 2003

    Esthetics over functionality
    As the work load of this semester will leave me without the resources to party and get drunk for the present, I will restrain my entertainment to a little experiment that I've started today.
    The living room hosts an armchair that Tupperware girl has decorated with two sofa pillows. I admit that it looks nice but the additional esthetic properties of the armchair are negatively correlated to the comfort of the seating (two pillows take a lot of the seating space this chair offers). I frequently move the pillows from the armchair to the adjacent sofa but every time I return to the living room the pillows have mysteriously returned to their former place. From now on I will make a point of removing the pillows. I want to know how many days it will take Tupperware girl to give up putting them back. Let the mind games begin.


    posted by Bunny at 8:46 PM





    Observation of the day
    At noon a swarm of swallows chases a bright green parrot above my head.


    posted by Bunny at 4:51 PM



    Sunday, September 21, 2003

    After-party
    That cocktail party I went to Saturday night turned out to be the like all the parties at our university except for the fact that TS was more drunk than usual. The party performance: Some skimpy dressed girls did a Brazilian dance. A friend of TS was visiting and I'm afraid that he might have gone awandering in the vineyards with Tupperware girl and done what a drunk red-blooded man would do with a blonde girl. Some people spilled their drinks on me that I wiped on the third shirt TJ changed into today. I danced shamelessly with some men and got a fake flower necklace in return and now my feet hurt so that I have to lie down. Business as usual. I wonder if the yogurt maker's still eating worms. Maybe it doesn't have to. Judo classes can be very rewarding.


    posted by Bunny at 1:06 AM



    Friday, September 19, 2003

    Cruel world
    We have finished furnishing our kitchen so that one of the kitchen counters now hosts a kettle, a toaster, JW's small oven, my ricecooker and Tupperware girl's yogurt maker. On this playground of kitchen appliances my physically superior ricecooker is the bully that takes all the other appliances' lunch money. Then it makes the yogurt maker eat worms for its entertainment (the nerdiest one always get picked on the worst). Currently, the ricecooker tries to recruit the oven to be its henchman so that it doesn't have to dig up the worms by itself while the kettle and the toaster mourn the loss of their lunch money silently ignoring the yogurt maker's pleas for help. After all, no lunch is better than worm lunch.


    posted by Bunny at 7:41 PM



    Thursday, September 18, 2003

    Cheese
    Time to get a hair cut: The photographer's coming to shoot our yearbook pictures.
    Actually it's not really a yearbook but a collection of the seniors' CVs which will be sent to the high profile companies that sponsor my little business school for their recruiting needs so that the class of 2004 is discussing whether smiling with or without showing teeth looks more friendly and if girls should wear a ponytail to look more professional. I try to convince TS that a little dab of powder would make his slightly shiny nose and forehead disappear but he insists on trusting the photographer's retouching skills.


    posted by Bunny at 6:16 PM



    Wednesday, September 17, 2003

    Eye candy
    We have a new cute young professor at the finance department. Unfortunately he has no fashion sense. Apart from that he's all that a girl is looking for: handsome with a good income... if it weren't for the ring on his finger. I wonder however if he's really married. If he had a wife, she would definitely have prevented him from dressing in an anachronistic brown suit matched with a pink shirt and a way too short brown-white-yellow striped tie at the first day of the lectures, right?


    posted by Bunny at 4:35 PM



    Tuesday, September 16, 2003

    Near-death experience
    I have another bullet point to add to my list of personal freak accidents: I was merrily riding my bike along the car-park of the university when suddenly a car exited the car-park at high speed and stopped right in front of me. I tried to brake but still rode right into the side of the car. While I lay half on the hood and half on the handle bar, a hysterical girl got out of the car and asked if I was okay. I had no severed limbs nor broken bones, so I told her that I was okay and rode home. Back home I've noticed that I had borne an injury from my close encounter with death...my crotch's bruised. Now I have ice cubes down my pants and I won't be able to cross my legs for a while.


    posted by Bunny at 4:26 PM



    Monday, September 15, 2003

    First day back at university
    Taking notes is painful as I'm not used to do any handwriting any more since I spent the last few months exclusively typing on my laptop. The only thing that I can write properly by hand is my signature.
    Otherwise it was a typical first day back: almost fell asleep in a lecture, freaked out about the work load and ate bad cafeteria food. They actually replaced the old caterer with the company that is also the cleaning company of the university. Scary.


    posted by Bunny at 8:04 PM



    Sunday, September 14, 2003

    Three minutes of fame
    Believe it or not but my picture is in the German magazine Wirtschaftswoche. Of course, it would have been far better if they had featured a one page portrait of me along with an article titled "Germany's new star" but in reality the article is about German universities. The picture was taken two years ago in our class and I am one of the little heads in the last row. It's funny to see my immensely bored expression among all those people staring reveringly at the professor and absorbing all his wisdom. (In fact, everybody was bored to death as well but only I failed at hiding it well. I guess I will never have an article titled "Germany's best hypocrite".)


    posted by Bunny at 11:28 AM



    Thursday, September 11, 2003

    Food attributes
    I have problems with ambiguous food whose taste cannot be categorized properly either into the "tasty food" category or the "gross food" category. Therefore I believe it's inappropriate to call bad food "interesting" because there really is food with a flavor that cannot be correctly named otherwise as "interesting" if you have an accurate way with words. To name one example: Apple sorbet with mint and chocolate bits.


    posted by Bunny at 8:13 PM



    Wednesday, September 10, 2003

    Deprimée
    I'm depressed. Therefore I will spend the evening chain-smoking and listening to chansons by Jacques Brel. I'd cry but I ran out of tissues. Besides, crying yourself to sleep gives you puffy eyes in the morning.


    posted by Bunny at 8:26 PM



    Tuesday, September 09, 2003

    Home improvement
    Instead of flowers and chocolates, TS gave me a giant leaf as a token of his eternal love. When I hang it over my bed, I'll be just like one of those little fairy thingies that live in flowers and trees.


    posted by Bunny at 5:48 PM





    Dinner conversation
    JW: If I were ice cream, what flavor would I be?
    TJ: I don't know. Something that tastes sweet... most of the time. Lemon.
    JW: You'd be pistachio ice cream. You like foreign words like "pistachio". And you're green with nuts in it.
    Me: And what flavor would I be?
    TS: You'd be bubble gum. Quite tasty but sorta sticky.
    [deleted sexual innuendos]
    Me: Well, TS, you'd be the cheapest 2 gallon vanilla ice cream at the supermarket.... but at least there'd be a lot of you.
    [Everybody proceeds to throw ice cream at each other, except for TS who is a sissy and hides in the closet]


    posted by Bunny at 12:34 AM



    Sunday, September 07, 2003

    Weird dreams: Nightmare marathon
    Having the misfortune of owning a mattress with the dimensions of 90x200cm in combination with having a boyfriend who is waiting for his own bed to be delivered since two weeks, I spent most of the nights sleeping on the floor as TS only has mastered the art of diagonal sleep so far. This leads to a sore back and many dreadful dreams during which I'm almost killed by giant cats with magical powers or forced to dance ballet in order to save my cover as an agent spying on an evil professor with ambitions of world domination. Damn you, IKEA, once again!


    posted by Bunny at 7:46 PM



    Saturday, September 06, 2003

    Saturday madness
    Instead of initiating a sitcom watching marathon like every Saturday, I traded the cozy spot on the couch with a real marathon through the wondrous land of IKEA.
    After reading a catalog about IKEA-land, you venture there with the expectation of handsome, cheery IKEA-people who go awandering through the towers of accessories that make living in your apartment a pleasurable experience. In reality there are masses of irritated and badly dressed co-shoppers that clog the paths in order to gaze at the displays of how perfect living rooms, kitchens etc. would look if they weren't decorated by ignorant suckers such as themselves.
    After looking at the 1,859,362nd lamp, the stimulus satiation kicked in and I felt the need to take one of the humorously named chairs and smash all the light bulbs in my vicinity. It seems to be a law of nature that you cannot leave IKEA before you have purchased at least one bag containing 100 tea lights. When we loaded the car we had three of those bags.


    posted by Bunny at 8:29 PM



    Friday, September 05, 2003

    Problems with nomenclature
    TS and TJ lured me into their apartment with the prospect of dinner but in the end I was stuck with the task of cooking because they were busy setting up a wardrobe. However, I'm not sure whether I'm allowed to call the construct in question "a wardrobe" as TJ forgot to bring along the top board, the shelf and the clothes rail, in short, all parts that enable clothes storage in a wardrobe. With all these parts missing, it's a very tall box stripped from its functionality which now stands in the middle of the living room trying to hide its utter uselessness.


    posted by Bunny at 1:54 PM



    Tuesday, September 02, 2003

    Misanthropic me
    I'd post something funny if I could think of something but I can't think straight due to the fact that there are too many people around me. What is more, the people-infested air makes me cranky as I have a special secret list of approved rules of conduct that many all people disrespect (maybe because it's so super secret). Anyone who violates those secret rules will have to fear my wrath. However, it's super secret wrath so that they will only realize it when they finally choke on poisoned food. Ha! That's what you get for placing your shampoo on the wrong spot in the shower. *manic laughter*


    posted by Bunny at 8:40 PM



    Monday, September 01, 2003

    Ominous finding
    While cleaning my room I found a packet of sleeping pills that my predecessor must have left there. The top of a two meter high wardrobe isn't the normal place to store this kind of medication, I think.


    posted by Bunny at 12:01 AM



    Saturday, August 30, 2003

    Reads for rainy Saturdays
    Excerpt from 'Daredevil: The Abridged Script' to be found at The Editing Room.

    INT. BIG CORPORATE BUSINESS OFFICE THING

    BEN AFFLECK enters and meets MICHAEL CLARKE DUNCAN.

    BEN AFFLECK IN STUPID COSTUME
    So what's your super power?

    MICHAEL CLARKE DUNCAN
    Well, I'm extremely fat, you see.

    BEN AFFLECK IN STUPID COSTUME
    That's it?

    MICHAEL CLARKE DUNCAN
    Hey, at least I don't look like a
    giant used tampon.

    BEN AFFLECK IN STUPID COSTUME
    Whatever. Now it's time to kick
    your ass, and I'm going to do it
    without my mask, just to rip off
    Spider-Man again.

    MICHAEL CLARKE DUNCAN
    Someone should tell Director Mark
    Steven Johnson that time needs to
    pass before a rip-off becomes an
    homage.

    [link via argh.de]


    posted by Bunny at 9:01 AM



    Thursday, August 28, 2003

    Something to look forward to
    I will be living together with a girl that can distinguish Tupperware from non-premium plastic containers by looking at the surface integrity. Many fun nights await me this year.


    posted by Bunny at 8:53 PM





    Third try
    My killing record today: three imaginary mothers with imaginary baby trolleys. I should keep the car away from the sidewalk.


    posted by Bunny at 8:35 PM



    Wednesday, August 27, 2003

    Second try
    I practiced steering and turning which left my arms in a twist each time. The instructor prevented me from denting what looked very much like a tacky-colored Porsche by stepping hard onto his second set of brakes but he shouldn't have bothered. Nothing that is bright pink-colored is worth saving.


    posted by Bunny at 11:27 PM



    Tuesday, August 26, 2003

    First try
    About two hours ago, I had my first driving class and I'm still psyched. That effect must be related to holding my breath during the whole 45 minutes. Steering and breaking is alright but changing gears is a bit awkward. My maximum speed was 80 km/h and the only thing I hit was a pigeon but it was already lying on the street and quite dead when I drove over it, so I can't be blamed for anything; my karma is still intact.


    posted by Bunny at 4:22 PM



    Monday, August 25, 2003

    Here's a little something for you
    I'm a firm believer of giving embarrassing and/or useless birthday presents in order to mock the concept of birthday celebrations properly. And don't forget that 'gift' is also the German translation for 'poison'. Coincidence?
    I was thinking about giving this to TJ on his birthday but he has proven to be a bad friend who deserves no such attention.


    posted by Bunny at 8:32 PM



    Sunday, August 24, 2003

    When small-talk goes wrong
    [Party]
    Me: Your name must be Jan.
    Guy: Why's that?
    Me: Because half of our generation is called 'Jan'.
    Guy: Hm, and the other half is female... therefore...
    Me: Uhm, forget it.
    Guy: My name is Olli, btw.
    Later on...
    Guy [reads the print on my T-shirt]: "Coeur de pirate - Paris". So, have you ever been a pirate?
    Me: What?
    Guy: Uhm, I mean, have you ever been to Paris?


    posted by Bunny at 10:39 PM



    Saturday, August 23, 2003

    Never again
    I planned a dinner for five tonight. Burnt my arm with hot oil. One person canceled, two other came half an hour too late and then the conversation revolved around people they've both known at international schools and South America, two topics that I'm not really interested in.
    During the dinner time I kept repeating a Jane Austen quote like a mantra: "It was a delightful visit. Perfect in being much too short."
    ...
    Yeah, I wish.


    posted by Bunny at 10:52 PM



    Friday, August 22, 2003

    Thoughts that come up while carrying heavy shit
    My boyfriend TS has typist's neuritis. Therefore he's unable to lift all those heavy boxes into his new apartment so that I was stuck with the task (thanks to CV for the helping hands, by the way). It's not the first ailment he's afflicted with, he has been plagued by his wisdom teeth, tonsils, nasal sceptum and many more things (that I'm not allowed to disclose). Maybe I should start looking for better genetic material. Please send applications to much.ado@gmx.net.


    posted by Bunny at 10:17 PM



    Wednesday, August 20, 2003

    A rose is a rose?
    If a child ever has the misfortune of getting named by me I will make sure that it will suffer as much as I have (let's just say that 'Annie' is a nickname). I will choose a name which contains either not enough or too many vowels and which makes it impossible to determine the sex of kid in question by reading his/her name.
    But there's still a long way to go before I'll be in the position to exert this cruel power so I'll kill time by getting some inspiration from the internet.


    posted by Bunny at 9:07 PM



    Tuesday, August 19, 2003

    Politically correct automat
    After getting lost while taking a walk in Mainz to kill time before my train departs, I'm finally back at the train station where they have the crappiest internet automats I've ever seen. You have to throw coins in it to start the connection and the keyboard is almost unusable as I have to type with two fingers in order to apply enough pressure to make the keys work. Then again, it blocks every site that has the word f*** or any of its variants in it (Lolita seems to be a no-no word as well...argh). That means that any blog I want to visit with colloquial language is off limits. What a waste of money. I'd cuss at the machine but I'm afraid that it will disconnect me for using bad words.


    posted by Bunny at 10:19 AM



    Monday, August 18, 2003

    Euro-connection
    I spontaneously decided to flee the constricted life in a small village and therefore will depart to the dazzling city of Strasbourg. There's going to be a reunion with my best friend RP as this is one of the rare occasions that we're on the same continent.
    I envisage the scene of our reunion as follows:
    We look for each other amidst the crowd of the train station. Then suddenly our eyes meet. RP and I run towards each other with open arms, ready to embrace each other. Then we will spend the rest of the day in a French café drinking café au lait and nibbling on whatever confectionary delights Strasbourg has to offer.

    It feels very decadent to travel abroad just for one day but I reason that France isn't really abroad because I don't even have to change money in order to pay for the café au lait.


    posted by Bunny at 11:55 PM



    Sunday, August 17, 2003

    Nature attacks
    This summer must come to an end soon. I looked into the kitchen trash can and the little brown thingies that I'd mistaken for sesame turned out to be worms. The heat lets insects and arachnids thrive in an improper manner and I'm tired of scratching the insect bite on my leg. The bite now has the color and shape on a hickey but only Steven Tyler could have created one of such dimensions.


    posted by Bunny at 6:46 PM



    Saturday, August 16, 2003

    First aid weirdness
    Today I had a first aid class from 9 a.m. to 2.pm. If I recall my friends’ narratives correctly, first aid class is the most boring ordeal in the process of obtaining a driver’s license but my class turned out to be rather strange than boring. After looking at a diagram, a guy had to lie down because he couldn't stand the sight of blood. During the following five hours he repeatedly lay down again as our teacher talked about the tourniquet, the best treatment for severed fingers and the Texas Chainsaw Massacre.
    In the end, we tried CPR on a special doll which costs 12,000 € and looked like one of the Sims except that it was naked and its extremities were missing. If it had really depended on our attempts at resuscitation, it wouldn't have made it but our teacher let us all pass anyway.
    My prediction: The only thing I'll probably ever need from this class is the recovery position. It's not only useful for unconscious people who might swallow their tongue but also for snoring bedmates.


    posted by Bunny at 6:21 PM



    Friday, August 15, 2003

    Staying alive
    After 21 years of not knowing how to drive a car, I finally decided that I need to know how to handle this miraculous piece of technology before I graduate and have a job. Otherwise I will never have time to learn how to drive and I want to enjoy the benefits of a company car if the occasion arises. Therefore I called up a driving school and will take my first theory class on Monday. Do not be afraid - I may have been involved in many bike accidents but I have only hit inanimate objects so far and I will try to keep up the habit of merely being a threat to myself.


    posted by Bunny at 8:51 PM



    Thursday, August 14, 2003

    Bastard
    Today I met TJ again for the first time this year. The first thing he told me was "You didn't do any sport in England, I see."


    posted by Bunny at 6:31 PM





    It got hearts and a rainbow on it
    I've found this really appealing T-shirt online and I want it badly.
    Why I should buy it: This would be a T-shirt that would make my friends say "This is soooo you" if they saw me wear it. I don't get that often.
    Why I won't buy it: I don't have a credit card. Therefore I am unable to buy every crap that I find online. All the excitement of purchasing any clothing will wear off within an hour of trying it on and matching it to every other garment in my possession, so it's not really worth it after all.
    Today's insight: Not having a credit card solves many problems in the consumption-oriented Western civilization.


    posted by Bunny at 10:25 AM



    Wednesday, August 13, 2003

    Sugar and spice
    My new comfort food is steak and rice. It used to be ramen. It has never been ice cream. If I have to choose between chocolate and chips, I'll take the chips. I think I'm not a girl after all.


    posted by Bunny at 3:58 PM



    Tuesday, August 12, 2003

    Progress report
    I actually completed all but two tasks of my 'to do' list. Of course, it meant getting up at 8:30 a.m. after four hours of sleep but I was compensated by the wonderful feeling of satisfaction when I ticked off the items from this list. I was in such high spirits that I even sang "I feel pretty". Mind you, I even tried to imitate the accent and sang every obnoxious 'la la la la' as loud as I could.
    That's why I prefer to be glum. It's a more dignified state of mind.


    posted by Bunny at 10:52 PM



    Monday, August 11, 2003

    Letter of revenge
    Dear people that found my blog over the search engine request "blowjob",

    if you're really interested in this stuff, please click the link to Joe's story: "Talk about blowing an opportunity". After reading this you'll never enjoy blowjobs again. Serves you right.

    Best wishes,
    Annie


    posted by Bunny at 1:15 PM



    Sunday, August 10, 2003

    In the heat of the night
    At the moment my ultimate dream would be a bed made out of an unmeltable ice block. I pity everyone who has romantic ambitions at temperatures which make you choose sleeping positions which prevent your own body parts from touching each other.


    posted by Bunny at 5:58 PM



    Friday, August 08, 2003

    Unused space
    I start to feel agoraphobic. You could fit my whole old apartment in my new bedroom and I don't have much furniture. What shall I do with all the space? I'd be spinning Hula Hoop but I didn't bring one.


    posted by Bunny at 4:41 PM



    Thursday, August 07, 2003

    Live and let die
    If I had a heart, I would be mourning over the untimely death of the many trees that I'm currently using to print hundreds of research papers. The only reason I'm doing this frightful deed is that I like to highlight stuff, otherwise I would just read them on screen. For this I deserve to fry in hell (which is probably just a scaled up version of the AC-less computer lab I'm sitting in).


    posted by Bunny at 2:30 PM



    Wednesday, August 06, 2003

    Weird things I do
    It's 34 degrees Celsius today and I've eaten six toasts with liverwurst.


    posted by Bunny at 10:32 PM



    Tuesday, August 05, 2003

    Uses for my pda
    Another day passed in stupor. Tomorrow I will write up a 'to do' list in order to create an illusion of effectiveness. I will fill it will many small tasks that I'm sure I can handle such as "take a shower", "open window" and "eat ice cream".


    posted by Bunny at 8:46 PM



    Sunday, August 03, 2003

    The fridge incident
    I spent an hour cleaning a fridge that smelled like a trash can during a summer strike of the garbagemen. The origin of this olfactory disaster was a couple of once-frozen pizzas that LM (the girl that previously lived in my room and used this fridge) left behind some weeks ago. While wiping off the mold with vinegar-soaked towels, I remembered that LM even had wanted me to pay her money for leaving the fridge in the apartment. I have hated people for lesser things.


    posted by Bunny at 3:56 PM



    Saturday, August 02, 2003

    Culinary dead end
    I moved out and forgot to bring the most essential thing: What will I do with 45 pounds of rice without a ricecooker? - Eat ramen.


    posted by Bunny at 8:44 PM



    Friday, August 01, 2003

    "Austin, what do you think about relationships?"
    - "Eeeeeh... um.... you know... everything is everything..."
    Tomorrow I'm moving out again. The change of air will do me good. I'll finally be able to stop watching MTV dismissed. Yesterday two fairly intelligent girls fought over Austin, a complete moron who showed us that a conversation can be more challening than a slice of bread.
    Naturally he chose the girl with the boob job.


    posted by Bunny at 5:11 PM



    Thursday, July 31, 2003

    Weird dream: The action movie
    I was one of Charlie's angels. As new recruits, this was our first task. We were on a mission to kidnap some scientist who worked on some world-threatening technology. Even though we had the kidnapping perfectly planned everything went wrong. When we were caught after a spectacular fight I said: "That only happened to us because Cameron Diaz wasn't here."


    posted by Bunny at 11:07 AM



    Tuesday, July 29, 2003

    Too much TV screws up Annie's perception of the world
    Spent my whole day in the library copying very dull parts out of dull books feeling very productive (if the definition of productivity is "doing something that bores you out of your mind"). Consequently all the phlegm of the past two weeks has been lifted from my thoughts. My brain seized the chance to call attention to the unusual high number of billboard ads for condoms in the neighborhood. This was after I watched a talkshow with the topic "I don't use rubbers". Coincidence?


    posted by Bunny at 11:52 PM



    Monday, July 28, 2003

    My life-force is draining
    In the absence of pressure to deliver productivity, I am overwhelmed by little tasks like getting up, grocery shopping or switching the TV program. It's a wonder that I still manage to breathe.


    posted by Bunny at 6:26 PM



    Saturday, July 26, 2003

    For the desperate
    Adult Nintendo Games


    posted by Bunny at 11:18 PM



    Thursday, July 24, 2003

    Summer time when life is easy
    I had a short vacation from the dull and ugly reality and spent two wonderful days together with TS during which we ate a lot of ice cream and had cocktails that tasted like ice cream (to be more precise: it tasted like Cuja Mara Split).


    posted by Bunny at 11:05 PM



    Wednesday, July 23, 2003

    No, it's not a fetish
    Every time I come back home to Oberhausen, I start to clean up my old room and sort out things that I don't need anymore but with every time it's gotten more difficult. Now I just go through all the stuff I didn't throw away the last time I was here, decide that I still don't want to throw it away and then proceed to reading my old diaries. In one of them I found two pages with locks of hair that I collected from my friends. I can't remember why I did that. I might have planned to use them in order to clone them should the need arise in future. People who know me better will favor the explanation that I wanted to keep them just in case I'd learn some voodoo.


    posted by Bunny at 1:06 AM



    Monday, July 21, 2003

    It's good for the reflexes
    Today my brother reintroduced one of our childhood traditions: hiding behind doors and scaring the shit out of each other.


    posted by Bunny at 9:37 PM





    Dinner
    My parents have friends visiting. This usually is no problem because after commenting on how tall my brother and I have grown, they tend to leave us alone. Unfortunately this time the nice lady thinks it's necessary to tell my brother (repeatedly) to move his chair in order to give me more space at the dinner table. Then she rearranged the plates. I hate it when people try to play hostess when they are in fact the guests. When I thought it couldn't get more uncomfortable, the dinner conversation turned to the subject "hepatitis". It's time to move out again.


    posted by Bunny at 1:06 AM



    Friday, July 18, 2003

    Best of dreams
    After two consecutive nights of dreaming about making out with girls I finally have dreams again that don't worry my boyfriend. The coolest dream I've ever had was about being James Bond. The most disappointing was about being Superman as I was subject to gravity and therefore unable to fly (the only thing I could do was jumping very high). My nightmares usually involve monsters/ gangsters/ cannibals or a Terminator chasing and trying to kill me while I seem to have lost my glasses. TV seems to make a big impression on me. The catharsis effect of my dreams is neglectable but at least they're are entertaining.


    posted by Bunny at 10:12 PM



    Thursday, July 17, 2003

    Not that I'm much of a cook but...
    The best thing about contact lenses is that I don't cry anymore when slicing onions.


    posted by Bunny at 12:02 PM



    Monday, July 14, 2003

    Once again
    I'm back in Germany.


    posted by Bunny at 10:28 AM





    Travel observation
    The airport in Dubai starts to become frightingly familiar. There the smoking rooms with their glass walls look like aquariums only that they’re filled with smoke instead of water.


    posted by Bunny at 10:22 AM



    Saturday, July 12, 2003

    On the move again
    Byebye Singapore: Going to miss Chicken Rice, Durian, Mee Siam, fresh pineapple juice and Bee Hoon.
    Hello Germany: Looking forward to licorice, Gummibaerchen, chocolate Currywurst and my mother's cooking.
    I should stop thinking about food. Motion sickness and airplane meals await me.


    posted by Bunny at 2:10 PM



    Friday, July 11, 2003

    What I learnt at my last day at work
    Never bring cake as a farewell gift to an all female department.


    posted by Bunny at 12:58 PM



    Thursday, July 10, 2003

    Banana leaves
    TS, some of his fellow DaimlerChrysler interns and me went to little India to eat Indian food with our hands. Had to keep in mind to use only the right hand and it didn't look very gracious when I tried to shove the rice into my mouth and it kept falling off my fingers. Now my right hand smells of curry even after washing it repeatedly. Eating with fingers might be fun, especially when the food is served on banana leaves, but I think that eating utensils were invented for a reason. It's nice to be able to eat something hotter than lukewarm rice.


    posted by Bunny at 4:59 PM



    Wednesday, July 09, 2003

    Downer of the night
    I had a blast tonight at Insomnia at Chijmes. However the fun was spoiled by a local friend of TS not being able to get into the bar because the bouncer/owner of the bar wouldn't let him in because seemingly only Caucasians (and their Asian girl-friends) were allowed inside. What a world. I thought segregation was over.


    posted by Bunny at 7:06 PM



    Tuesday, July 08, 2003

    Weird dream: The Fitness Vampires
    I dreamt that TS and I were trying out this luxury fitness club because it has a special promotion of 30S$ per person. When we left, we had to pay and those rip-offs charged us 50S$ each. I wanted to complain but it turned out that the staff consisted of vampires. Kelly Osbourne was their queen and they captured us and I had to humour Kelly which was not an easy thing as we all know, thanks to reality TV, that she's a bit of a drama queen. That's the weirdest dream I had for weeks, I'd never visit a fitness club.


    posted by Bunny at 4:44 PM



    Saturday, July 05, 2003

    Chilling
    Instead of the weather cast predicted thunderstorm we had dry and sunny weather for a BBQ. I made the best pasta salad ever and we had great food. Then we went for a swim in the pool without being electrocuted by lightning. This is what a Saturday should be like ... except that TS got a sunburn on his armpits.


    posted by Bunny at 3:37 PM



    Friday, July 04, 2003

    Weird product of the day
    Due to some more rain today, I got stuck in the underwear section of a department store and found a Pierre Cardin bra called "Sakura Aroma". The label informed me that this bra had 'special scented paddings that diffuse a sensual, lush, floral fragrance' which left me asking myself: "Why would I want to scent my boobs, do they smell bad?".


    posted by Bunny at 3:16 PM





    Just a bad day
    Thursday started bad: A train ride that lasted 20 minutes forced me to sit next to a woman whose Indian name would have been "Burps-not-too-loudly-but-constantly".
    Thursday ended bad: Rain + white shirt - umbrella = unvoluntary wet t-shirt contest.


    posted by Bunny at 2:49 PM



    Monday, June 30, 2003

    I can't lift my arms
    That's it, no more climbing for me.


    posted by Bunny at 5:46 PM



    Sunday, June 29, 2003

    Out of shape
    Went climbing for the first time this year. I haven't discovered such a nice climbing hall like the one that I had in France yet but it'll do for the couple of times want to do climbing here. Felt like pudding next to all these people who have been clearly doing this more often than once every semester. I didn't manage to climb much but it was fun to watch the shirtless guys climbing up the routes like spiders. Climbing would be such a sexy sport with all the muscles showing but the smelly feet that you get from the climbing shoes ruin everything.


    posted by Bunny at 4:59 PM



    Saturday, June 28, 2003

    Something I won't do again
    Once I fell asleep on the train. I just woke up to see the doors closing again at my stop. The train had already started to move but I still managed to thrust the train door open. As the train was going relatively slow I figured I could make it and jumped out. The outcome: Fell on concrete, ripped my suit, ruined pair of dress shoes and got a scar on my knee. The train stopped a few seconds after that so that the conductor could close the open door. Memo to myself: Wait at least five minutes before doing something stupid.


    posted by Bunny at 9:38 AM



    Friday, June 27, 2003

    Bad marketing
    "Makes life colourful" (Slogan for whiteout)


    posted by Bunny at 12:44 PM



    Thursday, June 26, 2003

    Observation of the day
    A guy dressed in camouflage and combat boots, probably a soldier, carries a "Disney's Little Mermaid" umbrella.


    posted by Bunny at 12:35 PM



    Wednesday, June 25, 2003

    The only fun thing I did at work today
    I played with the shredder.


    posted by Bunny at 1:07 PM



    Tuesday, June 24, 2003

    Skip the Honeymoon
    I don't have to marry TS after all (except for getting a pronounceable surname). We both come home from work at around 6:30 (if you count internships as work). TS usually gets home before me so that the first thing I'll see when I enter the room is him in boxer shorts watching TV. Then we ask each other how our day has been, complain a bit about work, eat something, watch some more TV and then go to bed. Then one of us says "I'm sorry, honey, but I'm soooo tired." We're already leading the life I expected to have when I'm 30. I feel so old.


    posted by Bunny at 3:43 PM



    Monday, June 23, 2003

    Harry Potter 5
    I just bought the book to see which character they'd kill off this time but so far I'm on page sixhundredsomething and still everyone that matters is alive. Bummer!


    posted by Bunny at 3:08 PM





    Saturday night
    Lychee Martini might sound like a good idea but it definitely doesn't have a positive effect on an Asian girl that already downed about a quarter of a absolut vodka bottle in less than an hour and didn't have a proper dinner that day. After my first attempts at alcohol with 14 I should know by now when I've had enough but when you mix different kinds of booze it has an unpredictable outcome on me. Threw up everything I could, then couldn't walk anymore and had to be dragged to the cab by TS and another friend. It's the first time I was so drunk I couldn't speak anymore so TS made me move my hand to signal him that I've heard what he'd said. On the next day I woke up with almost no hangover whatsoever. Barfing has its upsides.


    posted by Bunny at 3:03 PM



    Friday, June 20, 2003

    "Last four ... three... two... looking good."
    Corporate Workout Day: We got to do aerobics with an overly upbeat instructor who made us do linedancing to that "Summer holiday" song. The only solace was that the president of the company did the linedance, too.


    posted by Bunny at 1:10 PM





    Nature flash
    My inner city girl keeps getting excited over seeing animals. In England I saw a fox, little ducklings and robins but that's nothing compared to yesterday: I saw a colibri when going to a BBQ party. Later at the BBQ a bat flew over the pool. The tropics are sooo cool.


    posted by Bunny at 1:08 PM



    Wednesday, June 18, 2003

    Another HR story
    Today I read a resume which ends with "The End" on the last page. Does the guy who wrote this think that his working life is a fairy tale or what?


    posted by Bunny at 1:04 PM



    Tuesday, June 17, 2003

    Schwarz, schwarz, schwarz sind alle meine Kleider...
    Seems like I'm the inofficial goth queen of the HR department. The girls in the office have asked me for the third time whether I have clothes that are not black. That once again proves that no good can come from working in a guyless environment. If this had been guys I could've just made fun of pink and and cracked a Darth Vader joke but girls.... I mumbled something incoherent and tried not to choke on the oestrogen saturated air.


    posted by Bunny at 1:03 PM



    Monday, June 16, 2003

    Flower power
    The first time I gave flowers to a guy was to say sorry for kicking him into his ribs.


    posted by Bunny at 12:51 PM



    Saturday, June 14, 2003

    Annie 1:0
    I will have to find out the total number of kilometers I have traveled to visit TS. That information might come in handy during fights.


    posted by Bunny at 2:29 PM



    Friday, June 13, 2003

    Plans for tonight
    I know it's my first Friday night in Singapore and I should go out, go wild and get drunk but I really don't feel like it. So I've just bought three different flavors of ice tea (mango, apple and lychee), one bag of chips, 3 liters of diet coke and one bag of doritos. All this I plan to consume while watching four episodes of Friends on VCD. Alone. I feel like Bridget Jones.


    posted by Bunny at 12:52 PM



    Thursday, June 12, 2003

    Instant pictures
    I just had passport photos taken and I didn't want to wait an hour for retouching. So I look just like my mother on them. This internship isn't at all becoming.


    posted by Bunny at 3:33 PM



    Wednesday, June 11, 2003

    HR creeps
    Even though I've worked in Human Resources before I've never fully realized how frightening it is. I'm currently filing applications that were rejected and it feels voyeuristic to read the comments on them. First impression judgements: too young, too old, too inexperienced, overqualified, too whatever... And these motivation and personality tests look so predictable. Who would ever tick the "agree" box next to the statement "I prefer doing an easy job that pays well than a difficult one with less money"? No, of course, we all slave away for the sake of accomplishing something and money is no issue. I must try to become a better liar.
    On one interview assessment form there's a comment saying "applicant has 11 fingers". Now, why is this relevant and are 11 fingers a good or a bad thing?


    posted by Bunny at 12:41 PM



    Tuesday, June 10, 2003

    Question of the day
    Why would someone wear an ankle bracelet under pantyhose?


    posted by Bunny at 2:55 PM



    Monday, June 09, 2003

    Dude, where's my suitcase?
    Two days without internet and I'm on turkey... At work, I don't have any internet. And I'm in HR which means this is a girls only thing... and my main task at the moment is filing CVs. If it wasn't for the air conditioning I would think I'm in hell. But that's okay. I've found an internet cafe which is pretty close to my apartment. And after four days I finally got my suitcase from Emirates which left me without anything for four days. Fortunately TS got a credit card so we went on a shopping tour for underwear, casual clothes and a suit for work. The clerks must think I'm a sarong party girl. At least I got 270 Sin$ from the airline. The poor guys have been looking for that suitcase all over the world and today some guy called and told them he had took it. When we got it I was sure that he had stolen all the good stuff out of it but everything was there even though it was in a mess. What person would just takes a suitcase that belongs to a stranger and returns it after four days without stealing anything? He either must have been in a coma for the last couple of days or a complete asshole who likes the thought that someone has to wear the same socks two days in a row.


    posted by Bunny at 4:25 PM



    Friday, June 06, 2003

    I still live
    They have free internet at the airport. Great stuff. I just survived the roughest flight I've ever had. I even got sick which is not very practical with these watersaving toilets. Who had the brilliant idea of serving a breakfast that includes spinach? Anyway, I was glad that I threw up before the captain started the landing maneuver otherwise it would have been even less pretty. As if listening to an easy listening version of "How deep is your love" on the airplane (five times) wasn't enough to make you sick as a dog.


    posted by Bunny at 8:51 AM



    Thursday, June 05, 2003

    Auld lang syne
    Nostalgia night: Plugged the good ol' Super Nintendo into the TV and had some good Street Fighter Turbo fights with my brother. This game always makes me so agressive that I want to beat up my brother for real. So we switched to Secret of Mana where we got killed by some badassed mutant ninjas before reaching the final boss. Ah shucks!


    posted by Bunny at 12:42 PM



    Wednesday, June 04, 2003

    On the phone
    TS called me from Singapore to ask me to buy some duty free booze at the airport...
    Yes, honey, I'm looking forward to seeing you again, too.


    posted by Bunny at 6:14 PM



    Tuesday, June 03, 2003

    Singapore, here I come
    After three weeks of waiting for my working permit I will finally embark on the big adventure of doing an internship in Singapore on Thursday. It seems that a working permit is a very complicated thing. Apparently somebody from my company has to come to the airport and hand me the visa that comes with the working permit before I'm allowed to pass immigrations.
    In Singapore I will probably realize that I am much more German than I look on the outside. Hell, I can't even eat properly with chopsticks (even though I try since I'm 2 years old).
    I hope I won't screw up anything major. Throw out the chewing gum: check. Don't forget to flush the toilet: check. Don't litter the roads: check. Don't be involved in any indecent exposure: check. Throw out the drugs that are hidden in my teddy bear: check. Five laws abided, two million more to go.


    posted by Bunny at 2:06 PM





    New look
    Look at what 883's done for me. He talked me out of the green Hawaiian floral background I first had in mind and so we finally ended up with this really cool template (even though he still doesn't like the stars which are too girly in his opinion). Thanks a lot, bro. Also lots of thanks to Dan whom I owe this disgruntled samurai bunny. Let me know how you like the new look. Whew! I'm so excited, I think I won't sleep tonight.


    posted by Bunny at 2:00 AM



    Monday, June 02, 2003

    Ruhrgebiet blues
    I've spent the whole spring in Nottingham with all this lush green grass and flowers and trees that seem to like the temperate climate and lots of rain. It was a true nature spot where I got to see ducklings, foxes and robins which is a nice change of rats and pigeons in my hometown. In England the flora and I got along fine. Now that I'm back home my hay fever has broken out.
    NB: Oberhausen is a former coal mining town. There shouldn't be enough plants here to cause any allergies.


    posted by Bunny at 2:21 PM



    Sunday, June 01, 2003

    Je ne veux pas travailler
    I keep singing Sympathique by Pink Martini to myself. Who can resist depressive content hidden in a catchy cheery tune?


    posted by Bunny at 7:39 PM



    Saturday, May 31, 2003

    Catching up
    It's nice to be at home again. I'm missing my internet flatrate but I try to catch up on lots of other things. Quality time with Mom and my brother, Vietnamese food and TV. I can't believe that the first thing I've watched on TV for about half a year is "Smallville".


    posted by Bunny at 5:46 PM



    Friday, May 30, 2003

    Back
    I got into the wrong coach yesterday. D'oh. Still did manage to get back to Germany. Fortunately I had to change coach a couple of times so that I wasn't stuck with this Belgian guy who talked about god and showed me his Christian music CDs.
    I'm going to miss being called "luv" by English people. It was the first hot day in Nottingham and I had to wear my winter coat because it wouldn't fit into the suitcase anymore. Depending on hair endowment, summer is either indicated by the nice feeling of your strands of hair on your shoulder or a sunburn on the dome.


    posted by Bunny at 8:35 PM



    Thursday, May 29, 2003

    Last post from England
    I finally noticed a warning label on the British Benson & Hedges package which says "For adult use only". That sounds so dirty.


    posted by Bunny at 11:18 AM



    Wednesday, May 28, 2003

    Losing it
    Last night I saw a big black spider crawling across the wall in front of me. There was no male spider killable person close. So after a considerable amount of time staring at it moving I decided to get rid of it myself. Okay, I know that it's just a spider and it won't kill me, that it is probably more afraid of me than I of it, that it's a useful animal which will get rid of flies and bugs in my room and that the motto's "live and let live" but I don't really care. It's a spider in a room of an arachnophobe.
    I got the industrial strength vacuum cleaner that the university provides for each apartment and tried to figure out how to get the spider without it getting me first. Before doing so I typed a couple of words about the spider to 883 on ICQ and when I looked up, it had disappeared. That really freaked me out. I looked for it everywhere and even cleaned my room but it was plain gone. It would be nice to think that it would have crawled out of the window back into the wilderness but I doubt that it did in the five seconds I took my eyes off it. I imagined that it would crawl over my face during the night and I would eat it accidentally while I sleep. I kept the vacuum cleaner in my room but still haven't found the spider. Now I think I just hallucinated. This is probably the first stage of schizophrenia. Getting freaked out by imaginary spiders really sounds like it. I'm waiting for the voices.


    posted by Bunny at 10:04 AM



    Tuesday, May 27, 2003

    Small things # 1
    I like that AF takes notes on envelopes instead of using sheets of paper.


    posted by Bunny at 6:13 PM





    Erasmus
    Six essays, one presentation and four exams down. One more to go. I expected sleepless nights during my Erasmus semester. But not like this. Rather like that: Auberge Espagnole.


    posted by Bunny at 12:43 PM



    Monday, May 26, 2003

    Annie is egotistic
    One always finds funny but useless stuff on the internet. Here's a best of "Who is Annie?" from Googlism.
  • Annie is the muffin girl
  • Annie is left in the dirt and becomes discouraged
  • Annie is kidnapped and taken to the middle east daddy
  • Annie is almost caught in the cross
  • Annie is 20 inches and made from tea stained muslin
  • Annie is the first to be genetically altered with a gene for an agricultural application
  • Annie is a spunk
  • Annie is this week's echo magazine kitty
  • Annie is not Frank's idea of what a wife should be and the two remain at competitive odds
  • Annie is continuously told she is not and never will be like other girls
  • Annie is just what I need after a successive spates of oh
  • Annie is a rousing outing that will have your children chirping
  • Annie is an exception
  • Annie is no exception
  • Annie is despondent over the news she will have to share daddy warbucks's affection with a stranger


    posted by Bunny at 7:59 PM



    • Sunday, May 25, 2003

    Dumbest thing I've read today
    The pressure to be social through fatty foods can be enormous.
    (Cosmo June issue)

    By reading that I imagined the following scenario:
    Leader of the pack: Come on, eat this doublewhopper with cheese and bacon or you won't be cool!
    Killjoy: Oh no, fatty foods! I can't do that, it's just not right!
    Leader of the pack: You know what? I really don't like you when you're not eating this burger.
    The pack: Yeah, neither do we. If you are no fatty food lover as we are you don't belong with us.
    [moment of silence where Killjoy battles with its food conscious self]
    Killjoy: Okay, give me the burger... And to prove to you that I'm really cool, I'll order a giant portion of curly fries along with this.... and an icecream sundae!
    Leader of the pack: Wow, you're cool after all. Now you're officially allowed to wear our gang emblem.


    posted by Bunny at 9:53 PM



    Saturday, May 24, 2003

    Dilemma
    One of my major motivations for getting married some day will be losing my unpronounceable family name but my boyfriend's last name sounds too much like "semen" in English.


    posted by Bunny at 6:51 PM



    Friday, May 23, 2003

    Accomplishment of the day
    The exam was rather a disgrace than an accomplishment. However I did have a moment of success today: I prevented myself from sticking a post-it saying "Please clean the stove after cooking" on top of the stove. I don't want to be labeled as the anal German girl by my roommates.


    posted by Bunny at 11:44 PM





    Slow motion thinking
    It's almost 5 a.m. which means I probably won't go to bed before my exam at 9 a.m. I heard from somebody that you lose a couple of IQ points each time you deprive your body of its well-deserved rest. After all those sleepless nights I must be the living proof of it: For the first time in a couple of days I am not wearing anything black. That's the moment when I chose to spill some coke on my shirt. Memo to myself: Open mouth before drinking.


    posted by Bunny at 5:53 AM



    Thursday, May 22, 2003

    Obsessive compulsive behavior
    My hands feel raw from cleaning the caked oil from the kitchen stove for two hours. This is my personal version of fighting against entropy (entropy being represented by three olive oil abusing roommates). I feel like Monica.


    posted by Bunny at 5:33 PM



    Wednesday, May 21, 2003

    Question of the day
    This question is for the people who still remember "Sam & Max", one of the greatest adventure games of all times:
    Why does Sam wear clothes while Max is naked?


    posted by Bunny at 5:02 PM



    Tuesday, May 20, 2003

    My favorite super power
    The ICQ-concept should be transferable to real life. I need to switch to invisible mode. Or at least to DND. Although, if I had to pick a super power, I'd probably pick stopping the time over invisibility. Do you remember this really, really old sitcom with this girl who could stop the time by making her index fingers meet because her father was an alien? Situations where stopping time comes in handy pop up almost every day. Of course, you would have to ignore the physical implausibility inherent with the process of making all those atoms stop moving besides those that represent your body but who cares about physics? Science is just another religion.


    posted by Bunny at 5:45 PM



    Monday, May 19, 2003

    Trade-off
    The bad thing about losing weight is that a lot of the weight you lose has formerly been situated in your boobs. The good thing is that Wonderbra has a new collection of underwear with butterfly prints.


    posted by Bunny at 1:23 AM



    Sunday, May 18, 2003

    Do you eat enough vegetables, dear?
    Does ketchup count as a vegetable? I don't want to be lying to my mother.


    posted by Bunny at 3:41 AM



    Saturday, May 17, 2003

    Observations from the kitchen # 5
    AF showed me her new Italian cookbook which reminds me that I like reading cookbooks most when I'm on a diet. Masochism lurks behind every other corner.


    posted by Bunny at 2:54 PM



    Friday, May 16, 2003

    Childhood memory # 4
    Dolls can be really scary. Please check out the "Terrifying dolls" section of this site (link via Fragrant Lotus).
    When KN was little he dreamt that all the dolls in the house came alive and wanted to kill him. So he tried to get help from his mom but when she turned around she was a doll, too.
    Ah, the carefree and innocent time of childhood....


    posted by Bunny at 4:44 PM



    Thursday, May 15, 2003

    The globetrotter's guide to instant relief
    Some people have a standard repertoire of phrases that they know in about 10 foreign languages. These usually include "hallo, my name is ..." and "I love you", some cuss words plus two extra-phrases in French ("Voulez-vous coucher avec moi" and "Michelle ma belle lalala", thanks to the music industry). Usually you don't need to learn much more than those phrases because you can point at stuff you want or pantomime. But please do not forget the most basic phrase of them all: "Where is the toilet?"
    It will save you from playing charade with total stranger when they have to guess "the nearest place where I can make pee-pee." Of course the "I really really really need to go.... quickly...!"-dance is understood everywhere but is on the same embarrassment level.


    posted by Bunny at 7:38 PM





    Metaphor of the day
    'Economic anorexia' (Title of an article about Japan's demand problem)


    posted by Bunny at 12:09 AM



    Wednesday, May 14, 2003

    Childhood memory # 3
    When I was in 7th grade, it was customary to write little notes ("Do you want to be my boyfriend/girlfriend?") and to hand them to the opposite sex. The receiver of the "love letter" would tick one of three magic boxes: "Yes"/"No"/"Maybe".
    When I finally got the courage to write one of this notes, I gave them to a boy saying "This is for you". In my excitement I hadn't folded the note but crumpled it to a little paper ball. He mistook the letter for trash and threw it in the bin next to him. Ouch.


    posted by Bunny at 3:43 PM



    Tuesday, May 13, 2003

    Strange finding
    Just flipped through an old magazine and found a squashed spider inside. I don't remember to have killed it. Must be a case of spider suicide.


    posted by Bunny at 9:42 PM





    At the undergraduate office
    I had to hand in an essay at the postgraduate office but I had no clue where that was. Fortunately I stand right in front of the counter of the undergraduate office, a nice lady stands up from her desk and walks over.
    Me: Excuse me, do you know where the postgraduate office is?
    She: It's room A71. Just the other end of the corridor.
    Me: Uh, could I maybe borrow your stapler, please? [holding a bunch of paper, i.e. two copies of my essay]
    She [annoyed]: You're a postgraduate? Then you really should ask in the postgraduate office. We don't do this usually. I can make an exception this time and staple this for you if you want. Now, do you want to have this stapled?
    Me: Um,...I'm fine. Thanks. [walk away fast]
    Wow, I didn't know that people can go psycho because of a stapler. This kind of person would stab you with a fork if you asked her to pass the pepper.


    posted by Bunny at 5:08 PM



    Monday, May 12, 2003

    Little things
    It's the little things that keep you going on. This morning I saw a fox cross the road and little ducklings in the pond... and I got 65 on this essay that I did in a rush job of 1½ days. In the UK 65 means "Careful and clear piece of work". Anything over 80 is beyond reverence. This is a weird grading system.


    posted by Bunny at 11:35 AM





    The Mirror Project
    I submitted my first picture for The Mirror Project.


    posted by Bunny at 10:11 AM



    Sunday, May 11, 2003

    Bathroom moment
    Japan is a strange place: They have writing that takes years to learn. They think dried squid is a tasty snack. They think high school students should wear uniforms inspired by the Prussian army. Their vendor machines sometimes contain used panties. J-Pop will make you want to rip off both your ears and spent the rest of your life in the monastery of the mute monks.
    On the other hand, Japan is one of those places which seem familiar. They also obsess about Valentine's Day and Xmas. They have coffee, baseball and sushi. However some things we seem to have in common differ in the details...such as high-tech toilets featuring a seat warmer, bidet, bottom-washer and dryer, a lid lifter, and a digital clock that tells you how long you've been in the bathroom. It produces a discreet flushing sound to disguise any unpleasant noises.
    When KG went on a trip to Japan, she used one of those high-tech johns. Then she realized that she didn't know which button to press in order to flush. She stood up and tried a button. Suddenly the toilet spit at her. The jet of water was the toilet's bottom washer. KG's bottom had already left the toilet seat so the water jet shot aimlessly over the rim of the toilet. She tried to shield the water off with her hand but couldn't make it stop. Then she hit another button...which triggered the bottom blow dryer. Now warm air blew into her face in addition to the water. After frantically pressing all the other buttons that were left, KG emerged from the toilet soaked but she had managed to flush...and the floor of the bathroom was almost dry.


    posted by Bunny at 4:55 PM



    Saturday, May 10, 2003

    Romantic comedies
    Romantic comedies take place in a world where the following axioms apply:
  • Love conquers all problems
  • Soul mates exist
  • People who hate each other in the first half of the movie will definitely hook up
    Will this mean you will find true love in your nemesis from high school? Um, ... rather unlikely! Stuff like that isn't for real: this is the lovers' parallel universe. This is where Meg Ryan lives. Scientists found that people who are in love have similar chemical abnormalities in their brains as mentally ill patients. Both groups have a distorted perception of the world. Only that Hollywood makes more money out of lovers' parallel universe...


    posted by Bunny at 1:45 PM



    • Friday, May 09, 2003

    Big sister
    On Wednesday I had a brother-sister chat. That's one of the few moments where I can free up some time for my brother lately which is sad because we now get along spectacularly. This is one of life's ironies. When I hated that little brat for existing and drawing all the attention to him, I had to spend a substantial amount of my time with him. We argued so much that my parents had a new wall set up to divide our big room into two small rooms. Now I offer to give him coaching for his internship applications and buy him CDs. I probably try to compensate for the brain damage that he must have suffered when I regularly hit him in the head as a little child.


    posted by Bunny at 3:25 PM



    Thursday, May 08, 2003

    Stalking
    I'd be an awful stalker. I've been in San Francisco for four weeks and the only thing that came close to making contact with mighty girl (whose blog made me start my own) was looking up her number in the phone book. But it's nice to think that I might have passed her on the street without even knowing it.


    posted by Bunny at 9:17 PM



    Wednesday, May 07, 2003

    Level 7
    According to the Dante's Inferno test, I'd be in Hell if I were stuck in a nice place where the Minotaur guards some mass murderers who take a swim in their victims' boiling blood and simultaneously try to dodge arrows shot by centaurs. Oh, and don't forget the suicides dangling from trees which they generously share with the harpies!
    Hell according to Kevin Guilfoile is less dramatic but corresponds better with my personal concept of it. At the moment I may not be in Hell but I'm definitely in some sort of hell. Think presentation. Think Powerpoint. Think teamwork. L'enfer, c'est les autres. How true.


    posted by Bunny at 7:43 PM



    Tuesday, May 06, 2003

    The globetrotter's guide to better dining
    When abroad you will frequently find yourself in the situation where people will look at you with a blank smiling face while you talk. However, dear reader, be not mistaken: Those people are not deaf, there is no need for you to raise your voice. Let us review a possible scenario: A restaurant containing you & a waiter.
    You: I'd like to have a glass of white wine [blank stare from the waiter] WHITE WINE...A G-L-A-S... O-F...W-H-I-T-E...W-I-N-E! [the offended waiter walks away]
    Well, there you are. Nobody took your order. And no wine. Meanwhile the waiter is in the kitchen complaining bitterly to the cook that some asshole shouted at him. It's a good thing that you weren't able to order. Believe me, you wouldn't want to try the cream of mushroom soup after you shouted down that poor waiter. The cook is his best friend.
    So let's rewind to the beginning of the scene. The waiter has just approached your table. You smile. And point. To another table where somebody smart enough to speak the local tongue already ordered his wine. You gesture with your hand and make drinking noises. The waiter's face lightens up with understanding. Of course: you want wine! Don't be afraid, sir. You may be dumb enough to be a tourist without a travel dictionary but as long as your wallet is with you, your wishes are our command. You point to the cream of mushroom soup. The waiter nods enthusiastically: Mushroom soup it is, sir! You congratulate yourself on your highly advanced ability to make yourself understood. The waiter returns with both red wine and hepatitis-free cream of mushroom soup. Of course, white wine would complement the delicate flavor of the mushroom soup so much better but let's not get carried away, shall we? In Kongabowongaland or whatsitcalled, it's a miracle that they even know what wine is.


    posted by Bunny at 5:04 PM





    Word of the day
    Parthenogenesis: reproduction by development of an unfertilized usually female gamete. Boys, you're dismissed!


    posted by Bunny at 3:08 AM



    Monday, May 05, 2003

    ICQ after midnight
    ...
    TJ (1:12 AM) : Yesterday somebody offered me a blowjob in the library - isn't that nice?
    anniebunny (1:12 AM) : by a stewardess?
    anniebunny (1:13 AM) : whose name is claudia?
    TJ (1:13 AM) : Unfortunately: no. (what am I saying...I'm faithful...) by a hand that reached through a book shelf and gave me a note - don't even know whether this was some gayboy or a hot chick
    anniebunny (1:14 AM) : what? really? You usually know by looking at the hand whether it's a guy or a girl, don't you?
    TJ (1:14 AM) : Quote: "U are cute man, if u wanna have a blowjob meet me outside the library in a couple of minutes" - stupid, isn't it?
    anniebunny (1:14 AM) : rofl - and, did you want a blowjob?
    TJ (1:16 AM) : Of course I didn't!! I sat down and studied for half an hour so that I wouldn't meet Her/Him/It - scared that somebody's hand would touch my crotch before I could escape
    TJ (1:17 AM) : I'll never know who that was - but it was funny... especially this thing with the hand reaching through the shelf - how pathetic is that?!
    anniebunny (1:17 AM) : Who knows, maybe you missed the time of your life?
    TJ (1:18 AM) : I have a girl-friend and I don't need any times of my life!
    anniebunny (1:18 AM) : but at that moment she wasn't there to give you a blowjob, right? Who knows, it could've been the best blowjob in your life? Although... if I were a man, I'd be careful with blowjobs, ... I'd only put my penis into the mouths of people I'd trust.
    TJ (1:20 AM) : I don't care where YOU put YOUR penis, dear Annie!!!
    ...


    posted by Bunny at 3:03 AM



    Sunday, May 04, 2003

    Childhood memory # 2
    My parents used to tell me that the devil would come and take me with him if I didn't finished off the food on my plate. Illuminated with the light of modern pedagogy this might appear drastic but it's just another version of the "If you don't eat up your dinner, it's gonna rain tomorrow, kid!"-approach to teaching kids some discipline. I lived quite well with this concept until I was very sick one day. I forced myself to eat dinner but ended up throwing up most of it again. When I asked my mother whether the devil would come now and take me away, she thought about it for a second and replied: "No, honey, it's okay. For this time he'll make an exception."


    posted by Bunny at 4:43 PM





    Ego-boost or not dot com
    blog.hotornot.com seems to be working again, so feel free to rate me.


    posted by Bunny at 3:12 PM



    Saturday, May 03, 2003

    Observation from the kitchen # 4
    My apartment smells like a lard factory. I have long marveled at the fact that my flatmates can eat/drink so much oil without looking like a stranded whale or at least like one of these obese kids that barely fit into these class room chairs with the attached table but now my amazement has made way to annoyance. If they just ate it, it would be ok but the whole kitchen seems to be sticky with condensed oily vapor. The hot plate is caked with a black crust that had been olive oil in a former life. My inner German is unleashed and screams for the cleaning lady who hasn't showed up for a while. I can guess her reasons. On the other hand, the cleaning lady might already have seen worse: There's a poster in the kitchen to remind us not to leave trash in the apartment as "this could encourage maggots to breed if left for some time". How often must this have happened in order to convince the administration of the necessity of such a poster?


    posted by Bunny at 11:21 AM



    Friday, May 02, 2003

    Meat is poison!
    This is either a funny story on cows in an Outback restaurant or a story of unsuccessful actionism. Whatever you make of it. I prefer the first interpretation.


    posted by Bunny at 12:14 PM



    Thursday, May 01, 2003

    If I only had....
    2 ½ hours of class which consisted of three presentations with almost identical content. It was something about risk society as a new social paradigm, reflexive modernity, consequences for corporate management, blablabla. And now I have to write a 2,500 word essay on it. I knew I just should've married a rich guy. After doing some home decorating and shopping I would be watching the gardener weeding the garden, watering the roses and cleaning the pool. I would tell the housemaid to dust the books in the library. Whenever my incredibly rich husband would come back from his long and tedious working hours, we would try to get me impregnated so that I would have a hobby besides charity work and playing the trophy wife on cocktail parties. I would call the kids Sophie and Maximilian. If I ever grew tired of the kids, we could send them to a Swiss boarding school. Then I would get myself a cat.


    posted by Bunny at 9:01 PM


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